MTB - Chapter 37
Chapter 37: A Dreamless Night
The smile in Yun Yang’s eyes instantly faded.
She wanted to pretend she hadn’t seen it. After fumbling with her phone for a while without figuring out how to mute it, she simply hung up. But by hanging up, she let the other person know she was awake. They insistently called a second time. After three rounds of this torment, Yun Yang, thoroughly annoyed, finally answered the video call.
“Is there something you need?”
“Why did you take so long to answer?”
It was nearly eleven o’clock. Yun Guangwen seemed to be in the living room, and his family was still awake. The sound of a TV and a child’s laughter could be faintly heard in the background. Yun Yang’s face fell. “If there’s nothing important, I’m hanging up.”
“What kind of way is that to talk? Can’t your father call you if there’s nothing wrong?” Yun Guangwen hesitated, then got up and went into the study, closing the door. Once the surroundings were quiet, he finally asked, “I heard you ran into some trouble at school recently?”
Yun Yang frowned. “Did my counselor tell you that?”
“Something this big happens and you don’t tell us, yet you blame Teacher Liu?”
“Is this the kind of thing I need to call my parents about? I didn’t do anything wrong.”
“You child… If I hadn’t heard about it from your classmate and then asked myself, what were you planning to do?”
“When I was eleven, my teachers could never even find you when something happened. Now that I’m twenty-one, you’ve suddenly learned to ask my teachers for news?” Yun Yang sneered, her sarcasm merciless.
Tang Yuelou silently lifted her head.
“You…” Yun Guangwen was speechless for a long time, his face ashen. Yun Yang, however, didn’t seem to care. She sat cross-legged on the sofa and said politely, “If there’s nothing else, you should get some sleep. I’m hanging up.”
“Wait.” Yun Guangwen noticed the unfamiliar background in her video and asked coldly, “You’re not in your dorm? Where is this?”
Yun Yang glanced over at Tang Yuelou.
Tang Yuelou stood up. “I’ll give you some privacy.”
“No need.” Yun Yang admitted openly, “I’m living off-campus now, not in the dorms.”
“Who are you living with? Where did you get the money to rent a place?”
Yun Yang hated this interrogating tone the most. “I’m doing fine. You don’t need to worry.”
“Yun Yang!” Yun Guangwen was finally provoked to anger. He slammed his hand on the desk, his hands clenched into tight fists, his chest heaving violently. “Look at yourself! Why do these messy things always happen to you, have you ever thought about that? You’re in your twenties, all you do day in and day out is mess around, neglecting your proper business, always taking these crooked paths… Do you even know what self-respect is?”
The words were like a spark on gasoline. A loud buzz filled Yun Yang’s head as rage flooded her brain. She found it unbelievable. “What do you mean ‘self-respect’? What did I do that’s a ‘crooked path’? Do you think those rumors are right? Fine, even if I am that kind of person, what I do is none of your business! Didn’t you stop treating me like a daughter the moment you cheated on Mom and divorced her!”
When she got angry, she was almost reckless with her words. On one hand, it was because of Yun Guangwen’s indiscriminate scolding. On the other, the sounds of arguments from her childhood home seemed to have become a nightmare, making her unable to suppress the feeling of hypocrisy and disgust whenever she faced Yun Guangwen’s belated concern.
“You, you…”
The atmosphere was tense, on the verge of exploding. Yun Guangwen pressed his lips together to contain his anger, but he was still trembling with rage. Neither of them spoke, locked in a stalemate across the screen for a moment. A woman knocked on the study door, telling him to keep his voice down so he wouldn’t wake their son.
Yun Yang’s anger was cut short, and for a moment, she didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. After a long silence, she listened to the conversation on the other end. Her stepmother politely greeted her and told her to get to bed early, as if completely unaware of the argument that had just taken place.
On the other side was a happy, harmonious family, and she seemed to be a burden. Yun Guangwen would remember her, offer a few casual words of concern, or put on the airs of an elder and condescendingly “bestow” a few words of criticism—but she was long past the age of needing to cry in her parents’ arms over every little thing.
At this thought, once the indescribable anger had faded, the father and daughter faced each other again across the screen. The atmosphere was a bit awkward, but at least they had both calmed down. Yun Yang was the first to break the silence, calmly calling out, “Dad.”
Yun Guangwen froze.
Ever since Yun Yang had left home for university, they rarely called, let alone saw each other. Even their occasional chats ended in arguments. Such a calm tone was truly rare. His lips moved, waiting for what she would say next.
“The things from my childhood… I’ve already forgotten them. If this is out of compensation, please don’t bother.” Yun Yang lifted a corner of her mouth in a forced smile. “You have a happy family now. It’s not fair to me that you keep adding to my troubles.”
“You…”
Yun Guangwen had thought she had finally come to her senses and wanted to talk properly. The breath he had just taken caught in his throat, and his face turned from ashen to red, whether from anger or the embarrassment of having a sore spot touched.
“If there’s nothing else, I’m hanging up. You should get some sleep.”
Yun Yang unilaterally denied him the chance to continue arguing and decisively ended the video call.
The world fell silent.
Though she had said there was no need to leave, Tang Yuelou had gone to the study at some point, giving her the space to vent with dignity. The meal on the dining table was half-eaten, but when Yun Yang sat back down, she had completely lost her appetite.
She found her mother’s contact information. Their last chat was a Mid-Autumn Festival greeting, over a month ago.
Yun Yang hesitated for a moment, looking at the two stiff greetings, but ultimately didn’t have the heart to disturb her.
With Yun Guangwen, she always chose the harshest, most hurtful words, as if by shouting louder, she could cut open old wounds and make him feel a little guilt, a little torment. But when facing her mother, she was the one who felt guilty. She felt as if she were Yun Guangwen’s “accomplice,” having personally pushed her away and single-handedly created the current situation.
She couldn’t tell if it was numbness or disappointment. Yun Yang didn’t know what she was struggling with. She just felt a tightness in her chest and put down her chopsticks in frustration.
The study door opened and closed with a soft sound, followed by footsteps. A cup of warm water was placed in front of her. Tang Yuelou stroked her hair and asked with concern, “Are you okay?”
Yun Yang nodded and took a sip of water. “I think I just unilaterally severed my father-daughter relationship with my dad.”
Although Tang Yuelou had tried to give her privacy, Yun Yang hadn’t been mindful of her volume, so she must have heard everything from the study. She never brought up her parents on her own, and when she did, she would just make up an excuse or change the subject. With Tang Yuelou’s perceptiveness, she had likely guessed the general situation long ago.
Tang Yuelou sighed softly.
“I might be completely homeless from now on,” Yun Yang said with a forced, self-deprecating laugh.
“Yangyang, you’re very tired.”
Tang Yuelou hugged her from behind. Yun Yang turned and buried her head against her waist, sniffling.
“I may not have the right to interfere in this, but someone once told me that parents and friends are just passersby in life. They will disappoint you, and they will also bring you joy, but that’s just a small part of life. There will be regrets, but there will always be other things to fill them.”
All regrets are a stage in the continuous process of life’s regeneration, and it is in this continuous process of regeneration that humanity survives forever.
“I know.” Yun Yang tightened her arms around her waist.
At that moment, she didn’t understand the meaning of those words, nor did she know what Tang Yuelou was thinking. But in this person’s embrace, surrounded by Tang Yuelou’s warmth, she found a moment of peace from the fatigue that washed over her like a tide.
And so, she had a dreamless night.
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