Married in a Daze - Chapter 36
Chapter 36
Qin Zhenzhen had no idea what was going on with Lu Ruyun's sudden, inexplicable behavior. It left her just as bewildered as the words 'in the future' had that morning.
But she wasn't so foolish as to not hear the subtext in Lu Ruyun's words.
It was precisely because she heard it clearly that she was even more confused.
Was this a confession? Or did it hold some other, deeper meaning?
If the two of them hadn't previously clashed, hadn't had friction, and were just ordinary friends, perhaps she would have readily believed Lu Ruyun's words. But the problem was, their past relationship had been anything but ordinary.
It wasn't that they'd been deeply antagonistic, but at the very least, they had been like fire and water—utterly incompatible.
Given that, how could Lu Ruyun possibly be making what seemed like a confession?
Qin Zhenzhen sat on the stool, scratching her head, fingers sliding down her long hair. The thought that Lu Ruyun might be seeking revenge on her flickered in her mind, growing stronger then fading again. She replayed in her head the various scenes from their recent interactions—Lu Ruyun helping her analyze the pros and cons of Director Zheng's new project—letting them pass through her mind one by one.
It didn't make sense.
Could she genuinely have feelings for her?
Qin Zhenzhen shook her head. That hypothesis was even less likely than the revenge one. She sat on the stool, deep in thought, her bright eyes flickering. Outside, everyone was busy with the interview preparations. She sat alone in the lounge, sinking into silence.
A few minutes later, there was a knock on the door. Ding Yichuan and the others walked in. Seeing Qin Zhenzhen sitting on the sofa, they said with some surprise, "Zhenzhen, you're here so early?"
Qin Zhenzhen looked up and moved over to make space. "You're here."
Fu Cheng sat down beside her, smiling. "Is Teacher Lu not here?"
Qin Zhenzhen thought for a moment. "She's taking a midday rest."
Fu Cheng gave an "mmm," looking at Qin Zhenzhen with a hint of reluctance. "Once the interview is over, we'll have to part ways. These wonderful three days passed so quickly."
Ding Yichuan chimed in with a laugh. "Would've passed even faster without you."
Fu Cheng glared at him. "I'm giving you a chance to rephrase that!"
Ding Yichuan: "No, thank you!"
Wang Zi immediately burst out laughing.
Listening to the playful bickering of the two or three of them, Qin Zhenzhen lowered her eyelids.
For others, these were wonderful three days. For her, they were a muddled, bewildering mess.
The defensive walls she had built up in her heart against Lu Ruyun were gradually crumbling. A faint sense of favorability had begun to sprout even before she could figure out Lu Ruyun's intentions. But she didn't dare place her heart in Lu Ruyun's hands.
Lu Ruyun's thoughts were unfathomable to her.
And then there was the matter of the video—it remained a thorn in her heart, pricking her painfully every time she saw Lu Ruyun.
She thought she didn't care; it was just a video, after all. But in reality, she wasn't as magnanimous as she believed. When she found out it was He Shuangshuang, she had only one thought: distance herself from both He Shuangshuang and Lu Ruyun.
Because if they could resort to such underhanded tactics now, what about in the future...
No, Lu Ruyun probably wouldn't...
Qin Zhenzhen kept her head lowered, her mind feeling like a battlefield between two opposing forces. Fu Cheng, sitting next to her, leaned in and asked, "Zhenzhen, what's wrong? You seem down. Did you have a fight with Teacher Lu?"
As soon as she finished speaking, Ding Yichuan added, "Hey now, don't jinx Zhenzhen and Teacher Lu with that prophetic mouth of yours."
Fu Cheng retorted, not backing down, "How is that a jinx!"
Hearing they were about to start arguing again, Wang Zi tried to soothe them. "Alright, alright. We'll be parting ways soon. I don't know how you two still have the energy to bicker."
Fu Cheng and Ding Yichuan glanced at each other, snorted, and turned their heads away. Qin Zhenzhen watched their youthful, vibrant antics and simply pressed her lips together.
Soon after, Hu Jing also arrived. He came in and sat on Qin Zhenzhen's other side. Seeing Fu Cheng and the others had already started a new topic, he chatted with Qin Zhenzhen for a bit about the script.
Qin Zhenzhen looked at him. "Your scenes are about to wrap up soon, right?"
Hu Jing nodded. He estimated that after returning, he'd have just a few more scenes to finish his role as the general. His manager had already secured him the male lead in another TV drama—his first time as the male lead. Participating in this show was partly to generate some buzz in advance.
Qin Zhenzhen had heard some rumors about this. She smiled and said, "Congratulations."
Hu Jing looked at her radiant smile and clenched his hand. "Thank you."
Qin Zhenzhen smiled back and didn't say more.
Hu Jing had never been much of a talker; it was the same on set. During this show, aside from being able to exchange a few words with Qin Zhenzhen, the person who talked to him the most was the chatterbox Fu Cheng. But he always answered when asked; he just never initiated conversation.
So, he wasn't really one for casual chat.
Hu Jing glanced sideways at Qin Zhenzhen, his palms sweating. He coughed lightly, as if by accident. "Zhenzhen."
Qin Zhenzhen turned her head. "What is it?"
A somewhat unnatural expression appeared on Hu Jing's handsome face. "It's nothing. Just wanted to thank you for looking out for me this whole time. I'm not good with words, and my brain isn't the quickest. Thank you."
Seeing his sincere gratitude, Qin Zhenzhen was suddenly reminded of Lu Ruyun's clear eyes. She was momentarily lost in thought until Hu Jing nudged her. "Zhenzhen?"
"Hmm? It's nothing. No need to be so polite."
Hu Jing smiled shyly. "Then... can I come visit you on set later?"
Qin Zhenzhen composed herself and smiled graciously. "No need to go through the trouble. Who knows, we might collaborate on another drama in the future. Look at me and Song He—we're working together again, aren't we?"
Hu Jing's smile faltered slightly. He nodded. "That's true."
Just as their conversation ended, the door opened. Lu Ruyun and Shen Haitang stood at the entrance. Shen Haitang addressed everyone. "Get ready, we start in five minutes."
The lounge buzzed with activity for a moment. Everyone lowered their heads to look at their scripts, whispering amongst themselves. Qin Zhenzhen had seen the interview questions beforehand. Among the standard questions, quite a few topics concerning her and Lu Ruyun had been added.
She and Lu Ruyun were naturally the focal point of this episode, so it was no surprise they'd be asked about their married life. But after what had just happened, Qin Zhenzhen felt an indescribable unease looking at these questions.
Lu Ruyun sat on the sofa, her expression normal, showing no sign of nerves. She even occasionally answered a question from Fu Cheng.
Five minutes later, the lounge door opened, and everyone filed out. Qin Zhenzhen walked behind Lu Ruyun, hearing her ask in a very soft voice, "Have you thought about it?"
Have you thought about it?
Those four short words disrupted Qin Zhenzhen's steps. She tightened her grip on the script, pretending not to have heard Lu Ruyun's question, her expression impassive as she continued walking.
Soon, all six of them were on the recording platform.
Shen Haitang had changed into a white, sleeveless dress that fell past her knees, with many sparkling crystals inlaid along the hem, glittering under the lights. Her lovely face wore a comfortable smile, her speech was appropriate, and her posture elegant.
In contrast, Fu Cheng, being interviewed, seemed somewhat restrained.
Fortunately, Shen Haitang knew how to lighten the mood. The atmosphere became warm, and Fu Cheng unconsciously shed her nervousness, keeping pace with Shen Haitang.
The interview lasted an hour and a half, starting at 1:30 and ending at 3:00. Afterwards, everyone packed up their things and prepared to leave.
They had already packed their luggage and loaded it onto the vehicles before the interview, so at 3 o'clock, they went straight to their cars. Qin Zhenzhen and Lu Ruyun had the longest interview time and the most questions, but neither were newcomers to the industry; they handled these questions with ease.
Even Fu Cheng's eyes sparkled with little stars of envy.
The return journey lacked the excitement of the trip there. After the morning's activities and the afternoon interview, everyone was exhausted. They fell asleep not long after getting in the car.
Qin Zhenzhen leaned against the seatback, watching the scenery outside the window flash by again and again. Lu Ruyun glanced at her from time to time but never disturbed her.
Before long, Qin Zhenzhen also fell asleep.
Lu Ruyun draped the windcoat from beside her over Qin Zhenzhen's shoulders. Her bright eyes were dark and luminous. She recalled how, after she had said those words to Qin Zhenzhen at noon, Qin Zhenzhen had looked utterly confused and even asked, "What do you mean?"
What did she mean? She didn't believe Qin Zhenzhen couldn't understand her meaning.
She didn't deny having feelings for Qin Zhenzhen and wanting to take things further. But these past few days had likely also made Qin Zhenzhen aware of her physical issues. Whether Qin Zhenzhen didn't mind or chose to avoid it, she could accept either outcome. What she couldn't accept was this state of ambiguity.
So, she wanted clarity.
And she was waiting for Qin Zhenzhen's response.
Unlike the journey there, where Lu Ruyun had slept all the way to the base, on the way back it was Qin Zhenzhen who slept all the way to the production team's location. It was only when Lu Ruyun gently nudged her that she woke up.
"Zhenzhen, we're here."
Lu Ruyun leaned close and called out. Qin Zhenzhen rubbed her eyes and stretched her arms. Mid-stretch, she looked down at the windcoat that had slipped off, then turned to look at Lu Ruyun beside her, blinking.
Fu Cheng's voice called from not far away. "Time to get off!"
Qin Zhenzhen replied, "Okay."
Her voice, just awakened, sounded soft and sticky, lower than usual with a heavy nasal tone. After answering Fu Cheng, she looked down, neatly folded the windcoat, and handed it to Lu Ruyun. "Thank you."
It was very light, very soft, very pleasant to hear—somewhat similar to the voice Lu Ruyun had once heard when Qin Zhenzhen was acting spoiled with her mother.
Seeing Lu Ruyun not taking it, Qin Zhenzhen looked up at her. "You..."
"Zhenzhen, Ruyun, come down!" Shen Haitang shouted from below the vehicle.
Qin Zhenzhen massaged her neck. "Let's go."
Lu Ruyun came back to her senses, lowered her gaze, took the windcoat, and stepped out of the car with a composed expression.
After disembarking, Fu Cheng and Ding Yichuan said their goodbyes and were picked up by their companies. Wang Zi followed shortly after, getting into a black sedan. Hu Jing took a taxi back by himself.
Only Lu Ruyun and Qin Zhenzhen remained standing at the entrance of the production team's building.
In truth, Ji Lu and He Shuangshuang had arrived long ago. But they hadn't come out immediately, worried that people might grow suspicious if they saw Lu Ruyun and Qin Zhenzhen leaving separately. So, they waited until the very end.
Shen Haitang, seeing the two of them still there, offered to drive them. Lu Ruyun declined with a smile. "No need. Shuangshuang will be here soon. Zhenzhen and I will head to the parking lot over there."
Shen Haitang nodded. "Alright then. Drive safely."
After saying that, she waved goodbye to Qin Zhenzhen and Lu Ruyun. The remaining two, each wearing hats and masks, pulled their suitcases and walked towards the underground parking lot not far away.
Just inside the entrance, they saw He Shuangshuang and Ji Lu coming to meet them.
Ji Lu hadn't seen Qin Zhenzhen for three days. At first glance, she thought she looked thinner; upon closer inspection, she was sure she looked thinner. She frowned. "Zhenzhen, haven't you been eating properly?"
Hearing the familiar nagging tone, Qin Zhenzhen laughed. "I have."
Ji Lu looked at her with concern. "I think you look even skinnier."
Qin Zhenzhen ignored her exaggeration and just smiled, pressing her lips together. Lu Ruyun, walking ahead, turned and said to Qin Zhenzhen, "Wait for me a moment."
Qin Zhenzhen opened her mouth slightly. "Okay."
She and Ji Lu loaded the luggage into the car, asked Ji Lu to wait by the vehicle for a bit, and then, seeing Lu Ruyun and He Shuangshuang still talking, walked over with lowered eyes.
He Shuangshuang frowned. "What do you need Qin Zhenzhen to wait for?"
Lu Ruyun placed her suitcase in the trunk, her expression unchanged. "I have something to say."
He Shuangshuang stared at her profile. "It can't be... she already knows..."
Thinking of her behavior at the base, Lu Ruyun nodded honestly. "Yes."
He Shuangshuang looked at Lu Ruyun with concern. "Are you alright then? Should I take you to Doctor Ding's right now?"
Lu Ruyun shook her head. "No need."
Seeing He Shuangshuang still wearing a worried frown, she chuckled lightly. "What's wrong? Look at me, I'm perfectly fine now."
He Shuangshuang bit her lip, speaking haltingly. "But... Qin Zhenzhen... I still think it's not quite right. What if she wants to get back at you and deliberately..."
"Shuangshuang."
Lu Ruyun paused, her expression resolute. "She's not that kind of person."
Qin Zhenzhen had approached within a few steps, only catching fragments of their conversation. Just as she was about to call out to Lu Ruyun, she heard He Shuangshuang's words—the words "get back at" were especially piercing.
She took a step back, leaning against a nearby car, her bright eyes dimming.
After putting her suitcase in the car, Lu Ruyun turned around and saw Qin Zhenzhen waiting for her not far away. A faint smile surfaced in her eyes. She walked to Qin Zhenzhen's side. "Would you like to go for a cup of coffee?"
Qin Zhenzhen shook her head. "No need. Teacher Lu, if you have something to say, just say it."
Hearing her form of address, Lu Ruyun frowned slightly. "Zhenzhen, given our relationship, there's no need for you to be so distant."
Qin Zhenzhen let out a light laugh at Lu Ruyun's words, glancing at her nonchalantly. "Enough, Lu Ruyun. I don't want to play any more revenge games."
"If you haven't had your fill, I'm sorry, but I've had enough."
Hearing Qin Zhenzhen's words, Lu Ruyun's expression stiffened, her lips pressing together. "What did you say? Revenge games?"
Qin Zhenzhen made a tsk sound, her expression flippant. "Isn't it? You deliberately approached me, showed me favor, used tactics like the 'bitter flesh scheme' and the 'beauty trap.' Isn't it all just to get back at me?"
"Teacher Lu, I admit that night at the hotel, I shouldn't have let you get exposed. That was my mistake. But later, you leaked my video. We're even. So why don't you just drop this ridiculous act of revenge, okay?"
After hearing her out, Lu Ruyun's bright eyes glinted, flashing with a chilling coldness. Her profile was taut, her lips pressed into a straight line, giving off an aura of an impending storm. "And what about you?"
Qin Zhenzhen scoffed. "Me? At first, I thought it was boring, so I played along with you. Now I realize playing with you is even more boring."
At first, I thought it was boring, so I played along with you.
Boring. Playing with you.
Yes. That explained Qin Zhenzhen's hot-and-cold behavior. When she felt like playing, she'd come over to tease her, and also enjoy her 'clumsy' acting. When she didn't feel like playing, she'd ignore her, watching her toss and turn over her inexplicable coldness.
She must have been delighted.
Everything was under her control.
Lu Ruyun lowered her eyelids. "So, your attitude towards me was merely an act to counter my so-called 'revenge'?"
Qin Zhenzhen turned her head to look at her. "Teacher Lu, some things are better left unspoken between us."
Hearing this, Lu Ruyun let out a soft laugh. Better left unspoken.
The concern she thought she saw, the care she believed Qin Zhenzhen felt for her, was merely a performance to counter her 'revenge.' Qin Zhenzhen had never harbored any other feelings for her. And yet, she, Lu Ruyun, had for once been resolute, willing to open her heart, willing to speak of past wounds, willing to show her the places where she was still hurt.
She had foolishly hoped for tenderness, only to have salt rubbed into the wound—a wound that had just begun to heal, now torn open and bleeding again.
A fire of anger and humiliation churned in Lu Ruyun's heart, yet her expression grew calmer, more solemn. Her bright eyes looked elsewhere, a cold glint rising within them. She felt truly ridiculous. After thirteen years in this industry, she had failed to see that Qin Zhenzhen was acting. How impressive. What a person.
What a person.
Suddenly, she remembered that day at noon in Qin Zhenzhen's room, seeing that message on her phone.
—Zhenzhen, go for it! I don't think you could lose at any game! You're Qin Zhenzhen, after all!
Lu Ruyun smiled bitterly, nodding to herself. Of course. You're Qin Zhenzhen. How could you possibly lose at a game? Even in a losing situation, others would hand you the winning choice.
Seeing Lu Ruyun remain silent, Qin Zhenzhen lowered her head, preparing to leave. Lu Ruyun looked at her slender back, her straight lips parting slightly as she spoke in a voice bone-chillingly cold.
"Qin Zhenzhen."
Qin Zhenzhen stood still, hearing Lu Ruyun say with that ice-cold tone, "You win."
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