BSS - Chapter 90
Chapter 90
When Xu Wei carried out the last platter of food, the hot pot was already bubbling away in the living room. The aroma of the tallow-based broth filled the entire apartment.
The pot was simmering as Deng Chuan sat on the sofa, tormenting Zhou Liu, who was lying on her lap. It was warm inside, so she had taken off her coat and jacket, wearing only a white base-layer T-shirt and a pair of loose pajama pants. She looked both lazy and content. She exuded a subtle aura that was somewhere between mature and boyish, making it difficult for anyone to look at her and remain calm.
With one hand holding Zhou Liu steady, Deng Chuan deftly opened a can of Coke with the other. Bubbles fizzed out from the opening, and she casually leaned in to drink them. She was truly thirsty. Normally, she didn't care for carbonated drinks, but right now, she was inexplicably craving one. Her not-so-prominent Adam's apple bobbed as she drank down more than half the can in one go.
Xu Wei sat down beside her and reached out to stroke Zhou Liu's belly. "Turn on the TV," she said. "It'll make the place feel livelier."
As she spoke, she casually flipped to a variety show, not really watching it, just letting it play for the background noise. By the time she put down the remote, Deng Chuan had already placed some cooked beef slices into her bowl. The kid was very thoughtful; she even brought the dipping sauce dish over and gave it a gentle stir.
Xu Wei lowered her head and ate the slices of beef.
Deng Chuan wasn't in a hurry to eat herself. She continued to focus on cooking shrimp and tripe for Xu Wei. Her slender, fair fingers holding the chopsticks were a pleasant sight, even as they stirred the hot pot.
Xu Wei was already quite used to being taken care of by the kid. She didn't have a large appetite, so after finishing the first round of food Deng Chuan had placed in her bowl, she declared her lunch over. She put down her chopsticks and began peeling shrimp for the considerate kid as a reward.
Privately, Xu Wei loved watching Deng Chuan eat. Deng Chuan had a healthy appetite, which was very satisfying for the person feeding her. As she watched, she couldn't help but remark, "Your mother must have had an easy time with you."
Deng Chuan swallowed the shrimp in her mouth and asked, "Why do you say that?"
Xu Wei, thinking of something, lowered her head and smiled. "The two kids in my family were both a handful at mealtimes. When we were little… my mom often had to chase us around to feed us. As soon as she finally finished feeding one, the other's bowl would still be full… Then the other one would see that and get upset and start crying. We lived in the school dorms back then, and every mealtime, my dad's colleagues' wives and kids would come out to watch the spectacle…"
Deng Chuan laughed too. "You were so cute when you were little."
"Oh." Xu Wei's smile faded as she deliberately teased her. "So I'm not cute anymore, is that it? No wonder you've never complimented me."
Deng Chuan held back a laugh and said, "That's not true. You're especially cute right now."
Xu Wei used Zhou Liu's paw to poke her in the waist. "Compliments have an expiration date. It's too late to make up for it now."
Deng Chuan turned her head and grinned at her. "Teacher Xu, how old are you?"
The cat's paw swatted her again. "A lady's age is a secret."
The spicy hot pot had turned the kid's lips a rosy red. She looked at Xu Wei and said with a smile, "Then I'm your secret too."
She had said it casually, but it made Xu Wei's heart skip a beat. It felt as natural and earth-shattering as a celestial dog taking a bite out of the moon. Xu Wei let go of Zhou Liu's paw and pinched Deng Chuan's ear. After a moment's thought, she said slowly, word by word, "You're not wrong about that at all."
She said, "You are mine."
The heat from those words lingered until Deng Chuan had finished washing the messy dishes from the table and was finally able to draw close to Xu Wei's lips.
With just a light touch, the heat spread rapidly through their skin. She ignited a fire, vowing to burn away all the confusion and unwillingness of the recent past.
Both of their breaths were a little ragged. A beautiful, fleeting kiss brushed past, sending a jolt like an electric current through their bodies, making them tremble slightly. At such a close distance, Deng Chuan kept her eyes open, gazing at the beautiful sight before her. A shimmer of moisture appeared in Xu Wei's lovely eyes, hazily reflecting her own image.
She pressed against her lips, enveloped by an immense sense of happiness. It took her a long moment to calm her pounding heart before she murmured, "I love you."
Xu Wei paused for a second, then kissed her back more proactively and forcefully, parting her lips to give her a complete and lingering deep kiss.
Leaning against the headboard, she couldn't help but fall backward with Deng Chuan's movements. Just as she was about to hit the half-wall behind her, Deng Chuan cupped the back of her head, stroking her long hair and pulling her firmly and completely into her embrace.
The heating in the room was turned up high, making their skin feel even hotter where they touched. Xu Wei felt hot, like she was about to melt, but Deng Chuan, still not satisfied, licked her lips, pulling her into an even more scorching, confined space.
The bed, the quilt—they tossed aside all soft comforts. The curtains were drawn tightly. Outside, it might have been snowing, or perhaps it was still just overcast. In a rare moment of clarity, Xu Wei could spare a thought for the snow outside, but it was fleeting.
What remained was their inseparable breaths and the thoughts that rose and fell with them. Xu Wei felt Deng Chuan taking the lead, her young arms holding her tightly. She heard her murmur her name, "Teacher Xu…"
The sense of shame that came with that title overwhelmed Xu Wei. She couldn't help but think of the times when their relationship had been innocent. She turned her face away, her neck flushing red, and stopped her with an accusatory tone, "Don't call me Teacher…"
Amidst the undeniable heat, Xu Wei heard Deng Chuan laugh beside her ear. Puffs of hot breath washed over her, throwing her into an even deeper state of bashfulness. "Mm… not Teacher, but wife."
Seeing Xu Wei glaring at her with feigned anger, the rims of her eyes red, Deng Chuan couldn't suppress her mischievous streak. She laughed to herself for a while, continuing until Xu Wei was about to turn over and ignore her. Only then did she lean down, take Xu Wei's hand, place it on her own shoulder, and declare crisply, "Wife… come on. I'm yours."
The two of them messed around until they were exhausted, then picked up the quilt that had fallen to the floor and wrapped it around their sweat-dampened bodies.
Deng Chuan hugged Xu Wei from behind, resting her head intimately against her shoulder, and fell asleep just like that.
The kid was holding her too tightly, so Xu Wei didn't actually sleep well, drifting through a series of fragmented dreams. When she opened her eyes again, the room had grown completely dark. She glanced at the time on her phone; it got dark early in winter. It was just past five in the afternoon.
Deng Chuan was sleeping soundly behind her. Xu Wei turned over and watched her for a while in the dimness, able to make out only the faint outline of her chin and nose. Xu Wei watched quietly, reaching out to touch her face. Deng Chuan's breathing was deep and even, puffing distinctly against her wrist. She seemed truly exhausted.
With this thought, Xu Wei held her own breath and carefully leaned in, placing a light kiss on the kid's chin. Deng Chuan murmured something and tightened the arm wrapped around her.
Online, people often talked about loneliness. Many couldn't stand waking up from an afternoon nap to a room steeped in the dusk of early evening. They used all sorts of words and phrases to describe the loneliness of that moment when they opened their eyes, as if they had been forgotten by all of humanity.
Perhaps many human behaviors are driven by this sense of loneliness: living in groups, socializing, love, family. The city lights burn eternally, making loneliness feel like a dream from which one is on the verge of waking.
Before meeting Deng Chuan, Xu Wei was used to living alone. Generally speaking, she wasn't a particularly delicate or sensitive person, which naturally spared her a great deal of sentimental troubles. She had experienced countless lonely moments like the ones those people online described: eating hot pot alone, watching movies alone, staying in her room alone, spending weekends alone. In the evenings after a nap, in the middle of the night after being startled awake by a nightmare, she never felt lonely. On the rare occasions she felt a sense of loss, the rational Teacher Xu simply considered it the price of the life she had chosen.
Her innate rationality and detachment allowed Xu Wei to deeply and clearly recognize the other side of loneliness: the contentment that comes after making a choice, the satisfaction of achieving independence. Even if it meant being content in her own little corner of the world, she had no regrets.
Xu Wei thought the same way about her relationship with Deng Chuan. That was the kind of person she was. Even if she had hesitated and wavered at the beginning, once she chose to move forward without reservation, she would never look back.
In this classic moment of loneliness, Xu Wei faced the sleeping Deng Chuan before her, as if they were the only two people left in the world. She leaned against her slender shoulder and resisted the urge to think about how much more time they would have like this, just as on those nights when she woke up alone, she wouldn't dwell on the past. Now, because of Deng Chuan's presence, even that melancholy had dissipated completely. Xu Wei was no longer afraid of the unknown, nor was she afraid of loneliness. Love had turned her into a more fearless warrior.
She snuggled against the kid's face, remaining silent in her contentment.
She didn't know how much time had passed. The only sound in the room was Deng Chuan's soft breathing. Her young body was fast asleep. The way Deng Chuan slept made Xu Wei vaguely realize that she must have been very, very tired recently. She sighed softly and settled deeper into her embrace.
When Deng Chuan woke up, Xu Wei was taking a picture of her with her phone in the dark. The photo taken in the dim room came out completely black, showing nothing, which was exactly the effect Xu Wei wanted.
Deng Chuan's fingers twitched. She let out a soft, humming laugh, her voice thick with sleep. "What are you taking a picture of? Let me see."
The two of them studied the pitch-black photo for a while, confirming that no one but them could decipher the mystery within it. Teacher Xu used this photo to post on her Moments for the first time in a long while. Her secret partner, Deng Chuan, was the first to like it.
They leaned against each other, each playing on their own phone for a bit. Deng Chuan received a message from her academic advisor saying that the school had approved her materials for the exchange student program. Once the partner institution confirmed everything, she could prepare for the next steps.
Deng Chuan had just woken up and her mind was still a bit foggy. She politely replied with things like, "Okay," "Received," "Thank you, Teacher," and "Thanks for your hard work, Teacher."
After typing "Teacher" twice in a row, she remembered the teacher she was currently holding in her arms. This reminded her of the important matter at hand. She nudged Teacher Xu's ear and asked, "When are we going to Harbin?"
Xu Wei kept her eyes down, replying to a message, as she asked, "Do you want to go before the New Year or after?"
Deng Chuan said, "The sooner, the better."
"Then let's go before the New Year. That way, when we get back, I won't go back with you. I still have to make a trip home."
Privately, Deng Chuan didn't really want Xu Wei to go home. She didn't understand what was so great about going back. But out of respect for Xu Wei's wishes, she couldn't bring herself to persuade her otherwise. She could only hint at her feelings pitifully, "But I want to spend the New Year with you, too."
Hearing this, Xu Wei stroked the kid's face, her tone perfectly calm. "Then do you want to come home with me?"
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