Indulgence - Chapter 69
Chapter 69
Ruan Xin had just mentioned it casually. When it came to matters of the heart, an outsider couldn't make decisions for someone else, nor could they bear the responsibility. She knew very well that Yao Ran wouldn't handle things emotionally. Since she had chosen to break up, she must have had her own considerations.
"Being with Jiang Nian was probably the most impulsive thing you've ever done, wasn't it?" Ruan Xin chatted.
Yao Ran completely agreed with Ruan Xin's assessment. Looking back on her time with Jiang Nian now, she felt she had been insanely reckless.
"We slept together the second time we met."
Ruan Xin froze. ???
Yao Ran delivered this line with the same casual air, taking an elegant sip of her drink afterward as usual.
Ruan Xin forgot about her own drink, her mind going blank for a good ten seconds. She wondered if she was already drunk. How could such explosive words come out of such a cool, detached voice?
"What did you say?" Ruan Xin asked again, subconsciously finding it hard to believe.
Yao Ran glanced up at her but didn't repeat herself.
But Ruan Xin had already gotten the message. Only now did she understand how the two of them had gotten together. Director Yao either doesn't play, or she goes all in.
Ruan Xin now had a better understanding of why Yao Ran was so insecure. This relationship with Jiang Nian was indeed too out of sync with her normal life, and on top of that, there was Jiang Nian's dishonesty in hiding her age…
Once trust is lost in a relationship and a knot forms in one's heart, if it isn't untied, it's destined to be difficult to last.
Jiang Nian had been drawing design drafts like a woman possessed recently, immersing herself in work from morning till night.
Her colleagues at the studio all knew about her breakup and tactfully avoided the topic.
That evening, Jiang Nian planned to while away the time in her drawing room again. She had a number of draft sketches of begonia flowers on hand; a young woman had come in a couple of days ago saying she wanted a cluster of begonias tattooed on her back.
Staring at the begonias on the paper, Jiang Nian zoned out again. Her WeChat chimed, and she immediately grabbed her phone to check, only to see it was an unimportant message. She gave a bitter, absentminded smile. How could Yao Ran possibly contact her on her own initiative?
Her saying "let's break up" wasn't said in anger, where they could go back to how things were once the anger subsided.
How she wished it had been said in anger… If Yao Ran had been fuming and yelling those words at her that day, she definitely wouldn't be this upset now.
Just as she was lost in thought, someone knocked on the door behind her. Jiang Nian turned to see Yu Zhao standing at the entrance, dressed in casual sportswear.
"Want to go for a run?" Yu Zhao asked. She felt it wasn't good for Jiang Nian to be cooped up in the drawing room all day. When you're in a bad mood, it's even more important to get some fresh air.
"Sure." Jiang Nian also felt she needed to pull herself together. No matter what she had encountered growing up, she never let herself stay down for too long. She said to Yu Zhao, "I'll go change."
Yu Zhao nodded. "I'll wait for you downstairs."
Jiang Nian liked to exercise when she was in a bad mood. A good, hard sweat, followed by a shower and collapsing into bed, would let her sleep her troubles away.
The weather was perfect for a night run. Jogging along the street, watching the neon lights flicker, she hoped the evening breeze would blow away all her frustrations.
Jiang Nian didn't stop until she had run more than ten kilometers that night. Yu Zhao's stamina wasn't as good as Jiang Nian's, and she wasn't in great shape after keeping up with her.
"Sorry, did we run for too long?" Jiang Nian realized she had been so focused on venting that she had completely forgotten Yu Zhao was running with her.
Yu Zhao shook her head. "It feels pretty good to sweat a lot once in a while."
"Let's rest for a bit," Jiang Nian said, popping into a nearby convenience store to buy two drinks. She handed one to Yu Zhao.
They sat resting on a bench outside the store. Jiang Nian drank her beverage quietly. She looked up and saw that the moon was beautiful tonight, so she took out her phone to take a few pictures.
It looked beautiful in the photos, too. She stared at the picture, stunned for a moment. Every time she took a nice photo, she would eagerly send it to Yao Ran. She wanted to now, too…
Over the past half-month, she had wanted to message Yao Ran many times but had always held back. She despised people who dragged things on after a breakup. If two people weren't compatible, they should just part ways. There was nothing to agonize over.
Yu Zhao noticed her silence all evening. "Jiang Nian?"
Jiang Nian looked up with a start. "Hm?"
"Is the breakup hitting you that hard?"
"Not at all," Jiang Nian said with a laugh. She was stubborn and cared about her pride, not wanting others to see her less-than-composed side.
"Want to see a movie?" It was still early, so Yu Zhao asked again.
Jiang Nian shook her head wearily. "I want to go back and rest."
Yu Zhao smiled. "That's fine too."
As usual, Jiang Nian walked Si Mao home. As soon as she got back, she took a long, refreshing shower and flopped onto her bed, hoping for a comfortable night's sleep.
But she couldn't sleep.
She pulled a pillow into her arms, her mind once again filled with thoughts of Yao Ran. A sense of grievance welled up inside her. Yao Ran loved holding her when she slept; wouldn't she miss her after they broke up? Could she really just let her go like that?
There she was, agonizing again.
Jiang Nian buried her face hard into the pillow. Even exercise wasn't working as a stress reliever anymore. She thought she would gradually get over it, but she couldn't…
After some thought, she picked up her phone. Unable to resist, she posted on her Moments. It was the picture of the moon she had taken that night, with a caption: The moonlight is beautiful, did you see it?
She lay in bed waiting for a long time, but no interaction came. It was a subtle test, but there was no response. It was expected, yet the ache in her heart only grew more sour and painful.
Yao Ran saw it. She was also lying in bed, unable to fall asleep. When she scrolled to Jiang Nian's post, her gaze lingered for a long time.
Jiang Nian always loved sending her photos of the sky and then asking: Did you see it?
Yao Ran continued scrolling and came across another photo of the moon from a similar angle, posted by Yu Zhao: Night run, saw a beautiful moon.
Clearly, Yu Zhao had been with Jiang Nian.
After scrolling idly for a while, Yao Ran noticed something unusual. Jiang Nian's post from half an hour ago had no comments or likes.
Her light sleep was filled with dreams. Yao Ran dreamt hazily of Jiang Nian and Yu Zhao sitting together. Yu Zhao was wiping away Jiang Nian's tears, comforting her with gentle care. She dreamt of Jiang Nian clinging to the other woman, asking for a tight hug, nuzzling into her neck and cooing softly. The next moment, she was kissing her passionately, and sparks were flying.
When Yao Ran's eyes snapped open, her heart was pounding. She came to her senses and rubbed her forehead. Looking at the time, she saw it was a new day.
After a busy day at the office, Yao Ran suddenly received a call from Ruan Xin that evening.
"Your sister is here drinking. It looks like she's had quite a bit. Do you want to come and deal with her?"
Yao Ran frowned. "Is she alone?"
"With a few friends."
"Okay, I'll come take a look."
After hanging up, Yao Ran left her office and drove straight to Moments. She knew Yao Qi had been fighting with their family recently and had been traveling all over. She didn't even know when she had returned to Beilin.
Perhaps because she had an older sister who was excellent at everything, a standard she could never hope to reach no matter how hard she tried, Yao Qi had learned to let things go from a young age. She slacked off in every aspect of her life, her main principle being to just get by and be happy.
And it was precisely because of Yao Qi's nonchalant attitude that, since childhood, an exceptional amount of expectation and pressure had fallen on Yao Ran's shoulders.
When Yao Ran arrived at Moments, Yao Qi was still drinking and playing games with a few friends. The moment they saw Yao Ran, they sensed the atmosphere would turn awkward, so they politely greeted her and slipped away.
"When did you get back?" Yao Ran asked Yao Qi.
Yao Qi shrugged. "A few days ago."
"Why didn't you go home?"
"Sis, you know Mom and Dad are annoying enough already. Can you please not be like this with me?" Yao Qi grumbled. "All we do is fight when I go back. You don't want to go back either."
Yao Ran was speechless.
After graduating, Yao Qi had become a freelance photographer, which their family disapproved of, thinking she was wasting her life. "I've already found a place outside. I'll be living alone from now on."
Yao Ran said, "Okay, just let Mom and Dad know so they don't worry."
"I know, I'm not a kid anymore."
Yao Ran now thought about how Jiang Nian was only about Yao Qi's age… She awkwardly lowered her eyes. Why was she making such a comparison? Worried that Yao Qi had had too much to drink, she asked, "Where are you staying? I'll take you there."
Slightly tipsy, Yao Qi stood up.
Summer was over, and the evening breeze now carried a chill. As they walked out of the bar, the sign of the studio across the street was eye-catching.
The studio was decorated with considerable style, easily attracting attention. Yao Qi found it familiar, as if she had seen it on Weibo before. She asked Yao Ran, "Sis, is that a tattoo parlor? I think it's pretty famous online. So it's right here."
Yao Ran's eyelid twitched. The place Yao Qi was pointing at was none other than Jiang Nian's studio.
But Yao Qi was full of enthusiasm. "Since we're here today, let's go check it out."
Yao Ran stood frozen. Her mind wandered for a second before she turned to Yao Qi and said, "You want a tattoo? You need to think this through. Don't just do things on a whim and regret it later."
"I just want to look, I didn't say I was getting one. I wouldn't dare get a tattoo; Mom and Dad would kill me." Yao Qi's cheeks were flushed, and the alcohol made her seem even more willful than usual. "Sis, just come with me. We haven't seen each other in so long."
With that, Yao Qi pulled her forward.
Yao Ran frowned and said, "Why are you going if you're not getting a tattoo? Let's not go. I'll take you home."
"To see a pretty girl," Yao Qi said bluntly, her eyes lighting up. "There's a super beautiful tattoo artist there. I saw her picture on Weibo. I want to see if she's as pretty in person."
Yao Ran guessed Yao Qi was talking about Jiang Nian. When she and Jiang Nian were dating, she hadn't come out to her family, so naturally, Yao Qi had never seen a photo of Jiang Nian.
Yao Qi urged her, "Let's go, Sis."
Normally, Yao Ran would have ignored such a childish tantrum, but Yao Qi was drunk tonight, and she couldn't just leave her.
In a daze, Yao Ran was dragged by Yao Qi into the studio.
Qiu Lan was chatting with some others on the first floor. When she saw Yao Ran being pulled in by a young woman, she froze for a second, her heart breaking a little for Jiang Nian. But when she heard the girl call Yao Ran "Sis," she relaxed.
Many people in the studio recognized Yao Ran, but her status as Jiang Nian's ex-girlfriend made things somewhat awkward for everyone. No one greeted her with the same familiar warmth as before.
Yao Ran felt awkward too.
"Hello, can we look around?" Yao Qi asked Qiu Lan with a smile.
The studio's decor was unique and artistic. Even for those not getting tattoos, guests were allowed to wander around, take photos, and check in, which served as a form of indirect promotion.
Qiu Lan said, "Of course, feel free to look around."
Seeing that Qiu Lan was friendly and welcoming, Yao Qi dropped the pretense and asked directly, "Is your really pretty young lady here? I'd like to make an appointment to talk to her."
Ten out of ten people who asked that question were asking about Jiang Nian. Qiu Lan wasn't sure what was going on. She looked from Yao Ran to the young woman. "She's here tonight, busy upstairs. Would you like a tour?"
Yao Ran felt uneasy.
She still felt it was inappropriate for her to be there…
But Yao Qi was excited. "Huh? We can do that?"
Qiu Lan immediately nodded. "Yes, I'll take you."
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