BSS - Chapter 152
Chapter 152
It was eight in the morning. The sunlight was unbelievably bright, almost rendering the semi-sheer curtains useless.
The timestamp on the Moments post read 6:16.
The sky was probably already light by then. Xu Wei imagined the scene: the Little Friend opening her eyes in the faint morning light, lifting the arm that was wrapped around her. Perhaps she had just woken from a dream, still unable to distinguish reality from illusion, so she could only lift her arm, grab her phone, and try to ground herself in the here and now.
At that moment, everything was so chaotic.
But the emotion was sharp and clear.
This might explain why seeing those three words made Xu Wei feel a complex mix of emotions-a little dazed, a little tremulous, as if her feet were on the ground but her heart was floating in the air.
Xu Wei stared at the post with a complicated expression for a long while. The Little Friend's head was resting by her neck, greedily encircling her in a tight embrace. She was sleeping soundly, her deep breaths hitting Xu Wei's skin one after another, like gusts of warm wind.
The position wasn't actually very comfortable. But Xu Wei let her hold on, not moving, and started scrolling through Deng Chuan's Moments with her free hand.
The Little Friend didn't actually post on Moments very often. She rarely added captions, mostly just posting photos: Juzi's fluffy ears and snow-white paws, one of Zhou Liu's curly whiskers, the red carnations tossed into the air after an exam in England, looking just like crimson raindrops, a high-spirited group photo with classmates, their smiles brilliant. Then, Xu Wei scrolled to the silhouette photo Deng Chuan had taken of her, and after that, the deep blue night sky.
She and Deng Chuan had very few mutual friends, practically none. So, from Xu Wei's perspective, Deng Chuan's comment and like sections were completely blank.
That was fine, too. Xu Wei thought, it was as if she were the only one who knew these posts were all connected, a love letter Deng Chuan had written for her to see.
There was a slight breeze in the room. Her bare shoulders and neck felt a little cold in the air. They hadn't closed the window or turned on the heat last night, only covering themselves with a thick blanket. In the middle of the night, the evening wind had picked up, causing the sheer curtains to billow out in the shape of the window. Xu Wei remembered Deng Chuan holding her and laughing, saying the scene looked like a storm was coming, or like there was some kind of Disney monster outside.
'Awoo,' she had said. 'I'm going to snatch you away.'
In the darkness, her eyes were sparkling. Xu Wei paid no mind to her childish words at a time like this, giving her a push and telling her to close the window. But the Little Friend didn't move. She held on tightly, pulling her back into an embrace and clinging to her, murmuring against her lips, "One more time…"
So they went one more time.
In the end, neither of them closed the window. At this thought, Xu Wei turned and pinched the Little Friend's cheek. She didn't use much force, and Deng Chuan was sleeping so soundly that when she was finally roused, she found Xu Wei holding up her phone, taking a picture of her.
The blankets rustled as Deng Chuan, like a big, affectionate dog, wrapped her long limbs around her. Xu Wei shrank to the side under her weight, but Deng Chuan still stretched out her hand. "What are you taking a picture of… Let me see."
Xu Wei pinched her ear. "You slept for so long. I'm not showing you."
Deng Chuan gave her a quick peck on the lips. "What time is it?" After seeing the time, she rolled over lazily in the blankets. "It's so early. Did you have insomnia?"
Xu Wei nodded seriously. "I can't sleep anymore. You have to keep me company. No more sleeping."
"Alright." The Little Friend hugged her again, good-naturedly snuggling closer. "I'll keep you company."
The two of them held each other quietly for a moment before Xu Wei couldn't help but ask, "Why did you wake up so early this morning?"
"Hmm?" Deng Chuan tried to play dumb. "It wasn't that early."
"Six o'clock," Xu Wei said. "Isn't that early enough?"
"Okay, okay." Deng Chuan held her. "I did wake up. I had a dream."
So it was a dream. Xu Wei asked her, "What kind of dream?"
The Little Friend didn't seem to want to talk about it. After a long pause, she hesitated. "Um…"
She carefully glanced up at Xu Wei's expression and said tentatively, "I dreamed that we broke up… and it scared me awake."
Xu Wei immediately looked displeased, her expression strained. She even asked, "Why did we break up?"
Hearing this, Deng Chuan felt even more wronged. She pouted. "I forgot. I just remember you telling me to leave."
Xu Wei was speechless. She gave her an indignant push and turned away. "I don't need you to keep me company anymore. You can go back to sleep."
The Little Friend's voice was dejected. "Aren't you going to comfort me?"
It was faint, low, and pitiful.
Hearing this, Xu Wei couldn't bear it. She turned back to look at her and, after a moment, sighed. "Come here."
Deng Chuan scrambled into her arms, wrapping her arms around her neck.
They held each other, warm under the blankets. Xu Wei's voice softened unconsciously. "Then why did you make that post? And after posting it, you slept so soundly I couldn't even wake you."
The Little Friend looked at her earnestly. "Because after I woke up scared, you were sleeping right next to me. I quickly realized it was just a dream."
She tilted her head, thinking. "But you were asleep then, and the room was so quiet. I still felt awful. I've never been mentally prepared for us to break up. Even if it was just a dream, it put me in a terrible mood."
Xu Wei hummed in acknowledgment. "And then?"
"My mind was a mess, so I just scrolled through my phone. I was actually thinking of making a post for you anyway, and as I was scrolling, I came across the photos from our trip a while back. I never told you this, but that night, when I was holding you, you felt so solid in my arms, but your breathing was so light. You weren't looking at me, and I don't know how to describe the feeling… it was like you might drift away with the starry sky. That's why I watched the sunrise with you later. I had to watch it with you, to make you stay."
"I actually wanted to post a picture of the sunrise, but I didn't take one. It's all stored in my head. You looked especially beautiful that day, wearing my clothes. After I made the post, I actually felt relieved. Using the picture of the starry sky was right, too. It's like how stars have their own orbits, and we have our own lives. If it happened again, I wouldn't worry or be afraid of where you might go, and I wouldn't be afraid of you leaving me. Even in my dream, I would have resolutely gone to hold your hand, because you won't leave me. It's like when I held you and we watched the stars-the starry sky is fleeting, but you'll still be there to watch the sunrise with me."
"And then I fell back asleep."
Deng Chuan finished speaking cautiously. There were some things she hadn't planned to say, but the room was so quiet, it felt as if they had returned to that moment in the early morning. She secretly peeked at Xu Wei's expression. Xu Wei's chin was resting on her collarbone, her eyes closed. Her expression was calm, as if she had fallen asleep.
"Baby, are you asleep?"
"I'm not asleep," Xu Wei said. "I'm happy listening to you talk, so I'm listening with my eyes closed."
But she soon opened her eyes anyway, because the Little Friend was already tentatively kissing the base of her ear. When Xu Wei opened her eyes, she saw that Deng Chuan's eyes were a little red. A thin film of tears welled in those beautiful eyes, her lashes lowered slightly, hiding the fragile charm and misty, tearful gaze.
"Alright," Xu Wei said, cupping her face. "I'm not blaming you."
"You were mean to me just now."
"Okay, I'm sorry."
Deng Chuan hugged her and fell silent. Xu Wei lifted her face and gave her bitten, reddened lips a soothing kiss. "Why does my baby think so much? Come here, let me hold you."
Xu Wei rarely called Deng Chuan 'baby.' Deng Chuan felt the age gap that had long since vanished between them return, as if she had truly become a student again, looking up at her from below the lectern. Dizzily, Deng Chuan burrowed back into Xu Wei's arms and stayed still. Xu Wei's collarbone was starkly visible before her, and the scent of her hair drifted straight into her nose.
"Deng Chuan, I hope I've given you enough security," Xu Wei said, cradling the back of her head.
The Little Friend gave a muffled hum.
"The way I see it, love is actually very simple. If you let your emotions become too intense, love will trap you. I love you, but our hobbies and our circles of friends don't overlap. Sometimes I don't understand what you're thinking, and that's all perfectly normal."
"I know," Deng Chuan said. She repeated, "I know."
"We each have our own things to do. But love has nothing to do with those things. I love you anytime, anywhere. So I hope you won't get trapped in a fleeting moment of sadness anymore." Xu Wei pinched her ear. "Not even in your dreams."
"Mhm." The Little Friend nuzzled against her chest, nodding vigorously. Xu Wei lifted her chin. "Did I make myself clear?"
"You made yourself clear," Deng Chuan said. She lifted her head once more and kissed Xu Wei's lips.
The atmosphere in the room finally eased. It returned to the clear, leisurely mood of a weekend morning. Xu Wei showed Deng Chuan the picture she had taken of her sleeping. The Little Friend looked at it and helped her edit it. Once it was done, she placed the phone back in Xu Wei's hand without a word, just looking at her with wide eyes.
Xu Wei pretended not to understand. "What?"
Deng Chuan said, "Send it to me. I want to post the picture my wife took of me on Moments."
Why would you think I'd be willing to let other people see you sleeping? Xu Wei thought. So she huffed, "No."
Afraid Deng Chuan would say something else, Xu Wei beat her to it, tossing the phone aside. Then she patted her face, ready to get out of bed.
While Xu Wei washed her face, Deng Chuan watched from the side. The marks on Xu Wei's neck were too deep for concealer to hide, but luckily it was the weekend, and they didn't have to go out.
Suddenly, she heard Xu Wei say to her, "Your Sister Yang Jing got married. She sent us wedding candy. The package is arriving today."
Deng Chuan's eyes widened. "Huh?"
Seeing her surprised expression, Xu Wei felt a sense of relief mixed with inevitability. She suddenly had a strong urge to confide in Deng Chuan, and couldn't help but sigh. "Her family wanted her to get married. She probably felt it was time, too. I can't understand it, but Deng Chuan, I just feel like time is passing so quickly…"
Xu Wei didn't know what she was saying, but Deng Chuan understood. She raised a hand, wrapped it around Xu Wei's waist, and patted her back comfortingly. "I understand… Don't be sad. We'll live our own lives well."
They embraced, each feeling the other's presence.
Holding Xu Wei, Deng Chuan suddenly felt grateful for the recent series of events. The starry sky, the sunrise, the nightmare, the cathartic Moments post, the morning conversation, and now, this embrace.
All of it had become an indelible part of her life, a reminder of what they meant to each other.
Some people lose their senses because of love, becoming intense and blind. Some can't find love and yield to the pressures of life.
But they would live their own lives well, in love.
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