BSS - Chapter 137

Chapter 137

A quiet, long midsummer.

The living room curtains were drawn. Strong sunlight slanted through a gap, casting a brilliant golden line on the floor where Zhou Liu was napping.

Xu Wei sat on the sofa, idly swiping through her tablet. Juzi was nestled in her lap, his paw resting on her arm. Unable to focus on the screen full of numbers and graphs, Xu Wei decided to play with his paw for a bit. She vaguely felt that the house was a little too quiet.

Right, Deng Chuan was still asleep.

Xu Wei recalled waking up at noon. Deng Chuan had been sleeping soundly on her side, facing her. Her arm was wrapped tightly around Xu Wei's waist, the warmth of her palm seeping through the thin fabric. The sunlight made her face look so soft and harmless, completely devoid of the urgent dominance she'd shown in the car in the early morning, or the unfamiliar aggressiveness she'd displayed in bed.

She was sleeping deeply, her breathing even, as if she had fallen into a true dreamland.

Xu Wei was extremely careful. It took her some time to remove Deng Chuan's arm without waking her before she could slip out of bed.

As she pulled away, the kid let out an unconscious hum. Xu Wei looked down at her nervously, only to see that after humming, she took the arm that had been around her waist, wrapped it around her own head, and buried herself completely under the covers.

Outside the blanket, only the black hair on her head lay limply on the pillow.

Xu Wei sighed with a smile, then reached out to pull the blanket down a little and gently scraped the tip of her nose.

Deng Chuan's sleeping form made Xu Wei feel exceptionally relaxed. But correspondingly, she no longer felt like sleeping herself. Xu Wei became wide awake. She stared at Deng Chuan for a while, and the image of the person sleeping before her gradually overlapped with the many mornings etched in her memory.

No difference, there was no difference at all; nothing had changed. Xu Wei believed the changes she'd noticed in Deng Chuan last night weren't fake, but she also had to admit that this Deng Chuan, just as she'd always been, still made her heart soften. With that thought, Xu Wei smiled gently, leaned down to kiss Deng Chuan's forehead, and then reached out to tap her lips.

The morning had been entirely spent in deep sleep. Xu Wei got out of bed, washed up carefully, stirred cereal into her warmed milk, and then sat on the sofa, half-heartedly looking over her recent work.

Besides her work at the school, Xu Wei also took on some data processing jobs for academic papers. Although she had graduated many years ago, she still maintained some of her old connections. Her master's supervisor had since moved into an administrative role. He had admired her greatly back then and still occasionally introduced her to new junior colleagues and academic channels.

So, in a sense, Xu Wei had never strayed far from academia. She would occasionally read cutting-edge papers in her chosen field, though it was limited to just reading. High school teaching was simply too demanding, consuming most of her energy.

Regarding Xu Wei's choice to become a high school teacher, her supervisor hadn't said much. Just like his own choice to switch from academia to administration, life was full of choices. Deciding what kind of life to live was a person's freedom.

Given her master's supervisor's reputation, the new junior students were all quite outstanding. Coupled with the intense competition among young people today, these juniors had become more extroverted and eager to share amidst the ebb and flow of motivation and pressure. This allowed Xu Wei, even in their limited interactions, to get a sense of the pressures and lives these young students were facing.

Influenced by these junior colleagues, Xu Wei couldn't help but recall her own student days. At the same time, she could vaguely understand the situation Deng Chuan was now facing.

Her mood, as a result, became very complicated.

When Deng Chuan was away, Xu Wei could rely on missing her to ease these complex feelings. But now, Deng Chuan was back.

Deng Chuan's return made Xu Wei's complicated feelings more three-dimensional and detailed. Thanks to her knack for simplifying complex issues, she quickly analyzed the reasons behind her complicated mood.

There were many reasons, of course: first and foremost was a sense of confusion. Time had passed so quickly without her noticing; even the year abroad that Deng Chuan had imagined would be so hard to endure had flown by, yet Xu Wei felt somewhat lost. Then there was her advancing age amidst this confusion, her regular yet monotonous life, and a worry that had always lurked in her heart: her life was gradually becoming mundane.

Analyzing the reasons without being able to resolve them was something that caused Xu Wei great pain.

But fortunately, Deng Chuan's return held a more significant meaning. In the short night since they'd reunited, Deng Chuan had already touched Xu Wei's heart so many times. Her presence, her changes and her constants, even her passion and gentleness, all gave Xu Wei a sufficient sense of security and impulse, giving her the courage to start making a change of her own.

At this thought, Xu Wei's finger, which had been marking something on the tablet, paused.

She paused for a long time. Even Juzi had fallen asleep in her lap, and she still hadn't turned a single page of the document on her tablet.

Summer afternoons were very quiet. It was too hot outside, so everyone was napping at home. The noisy chirping of cicadas, near and far, only served to make the silence feel distant one moment and close the next.

In this silence that alternately receded and drew near, Xu Wei heard the bedroom door click softly.

"Deng Chuan?" she called out. "You're awake?"

There was no answer from inside, but the kid quickly walked out. She was barefoot, her hair was a mess, and one pant leg was hitched higher than the other, revealing a slender ankle.

Matching her just-woken appearance, Deng Chuan displayed a contradictory demeanor. She casually combed her hair back with her fingers while hurriedly walking over to hug her.

"Mm..." Soon, Xu Wei, along with Juzi, was pulled into a full embrace. As they drew close, Xu Wei realized Deng Chuan was hugging her with great force, causing Xu Wei to let out an involuntary grunt and startling the sleeping Juzi, who scrambled out of her lap and scurried away.

It was a little strange, but Xu Wei didn't mind. She let her hold on for a while before patting the kid's head, which was buried in the crook of her neck. "Hungry? Want something to eat?"

Deng Chuan shook her head without speaking, only hugging Xu Wei tighter. Then she let go, sat down close to Xu Wei, and leaned against her shoulder to see what she was looking at on the tablet.

Xu Wei openly let her look.

Deng Chuan probably couldn't understand it, and even if she could grasp parts, it would only be a partial understanding. But she kept staring at the tablet.

Xu Wei started to feel that something was off. She turned to look at her. The kid's expression was very serious, not like someone looking at a screen full of incomprehensible numbers and graphs.

Soon, Deng Chuan also turned her head to look at Xu Wei.

Xu Wei saw her blink slowly, a glint of moisture flashing in her eyes.

"Teacher Xu," Deng Chuan said.

Xu Wei tilted her head, waiting for her to continue.

"I want to look for an internship."

"Okay." For some reason, hearing this, Xu Wei suddenly felt a sense of relief. Of course, she had no objection to Deng Chuan's decision; in fact, she strongly approved. "For your major, internship experience is really important. So... have you thought about where you want to apply?"

Deng Chuan smiled. She seemed a little shy, yet also apprehensive. The corners of her mouth, which had turned up, quickly went back down. "Not yet."

"Mm," Xu Wei raised a hand to stroke her head. "Think it over carefully. Don't hesitate. Once you've decided, just do it."

Xu Wei immediately realized she had said that so quickly, so naturally, as if the words had been bottled up inside her for a long time and had slipped out at the first opportunity, under the guise of speaking to Deng Chuan.

Was this something she needed to tell herself, too?

Deng Chuan didn't notice Xu Wei's lapse in attention. She was thinking about something else. Another thought was churning inside her. Even after announcing her decision to get an internship, it didn't feel like enough, and she started biting her lower lip involuntarily.

Xu Wei seemed to finally come back to her senses and spoke again. "There aren't as many opportunities here as in Beijing. If you're looking for an internship, I suggest you apply to companies in Beijing. You're still young, so your resume might not be that impressive, but your advantage is your strong academic background. Good companies will be willing to start training you now."

Deng Chuan stared blankly at Xu Wei's lips, so close to her, opening and closing, and nodded vigorously.

"Mm..." Xu Wei wanted to say more. She needed more reasons to convince herself, or perhaps, what she really needed was a greater force.

The next second, Deng Chuan suddenly threw her arms around her.

She held on so tightly. Their bodies were pressed together, each feeling the softness of the other. As their breaths mingled, it was as if their very souls were clinging to each other.

"Xu Wei." Deng Chuan's lips were against Xu Wei's ear, her breath warm on her skin. She was saying her name seriously, word by word. Xu Wei felt a little dazed and a little nervous, as if some momentous change was about to befall them both.

And Deng Chuan was the one delivering the oracle.

Deng Chuan pressed close to Xu Wei's ear, took a deep breath, and said, "Before I go do my internship, I want to tell my family about us."

In Deng Chuan's arms, Xu Wei blinked slowly. This time, a glint of moisture flashed in her eyes, too. The kid was still waiting for her reply. Thinking this, Xu Wei reined in her dizzying thoughts and gripped Deng Chuan's shoulders firmly. "...Think about it again... The internship and coming out aren't necessarily related, but the consequences will definitely be different..."

A silence fell between them.

"I'm going to do it."

After the silence, Deng Chuan stared into Xu Wei's eyes and spoke with certainty. Xu Wei had shown disapproval of her decision, which made her feel both flustered and a little defiant. While feeling the impact, the sharp edge of youthfulness reasserted itself throughout her body and mind. But she also desperately wanted to tell Xu Wei that this decision wasn't a whim, but one she had thought through thoroughly and didn't regret in the slightest. "Don't be afraid. I'm not coming out because of the internship. I just feel... I need to let everything settle."

In Xu Wei's eyes, Deng Chuan's were so bright, so resolute. "As for the consequences, whatever they may be, I can bear them."

"Alright." After just a few seconds, the corners of Xu Wei's mouth lifted slightly. Her kid was holding her tightly, looking at her, and Xu Wei felt an unprecedented sense of ease.

"I have a decision to tell you, too," Xu Wei said.

"Deng Chuan."

"I've decided to quit my job and take the entrance exam for a PhD program."

"A PhD at P University."

Get instant access to all the chapters now.

Previous Table of Contents Next