PSW - Chapter 45

Chapter 45

Zheng Yi woke up.

It felt as if she had simply taken a nap, albeit a rather long one.

[You're finally awake! Are you okay? Do you remember what happened before?]

The moment she regained consciousness, Zero One's voice drilled into her mind. It chattered away, asking about her condition while spilling everything that had happened over the past two days like beans from a bamboo tube.

Inevitably, every other word was about Yu Yinan.

[You didn't dig out her heart, so does that mean you're not going to kill her? See, she still believes you're a Saint.] Zero One wanted to ask if Zheng Yi had been moved by Yu Yinan, and how she planned to interact with her from now on. Or perhaps they would part ways?

It was dying to know.

But Zheng Yi's expression was not pleasant, which made Zero One stop talking in time, refraining from bombarding her with a barrage of questions.

Zheng Yi didn't answer any of them. She sat up in bed, conjured some water to drink, then took out a compressed biscuit and began to eat with her head lowered.

Just then, Yu Yinan heard the noise and quickly pushed the door open, coming face-to-face with Zheng Yi.

Zheng Yi continued to chew, her face devoid of expression. She merely glanced up at Yu Yinan before lowering her head to eat again.

"You just woke up. You should have some hot porridge first," Yu Yinan said softly, her eyes fixed on her. In the end, she didn't ask about what had happened before Zheng Yi fell unconscious. Instead, she turned, brought in a bowl of hot porridge, and offered it to her.

Zheng Yi took the spoon and calmly began to eat. Yu Yinan stood by her bed, quietly watching her.

When the last spoonful was gone, Yu Yinan took the bowl and spoon from Zheng Yi's hands, placed them back in the living room, and returned.

She wiped Zheng Yi's face with a warm, damp towel, then checked her forehead for a fever before asking, "Do you feel unwell anywhere?"

"I'm fine." Only then did Zheng Yi begin to size up Yu Yinan. She let out a low laugh. "You don't remember what happened before?"

"I remember." Yu Yinan seemed to recall Zheng Yi's appearance from that time. She clenched the corner of the blanket, then forced her hand to relax. She met Zheng Yi's dark eyes, unable to describe the emotion she was feeling. "Don't you want to see my heart anymore?"

"Are you that eager to die by my hand?" Zheng Yi raised a hand. The emotion in her eyes was indifferent and distant, and even the usual smile on her lips had vanished.

In that instant, Zheng Yi became even more of a stranger. Her state was more unsettling to Yu Yinan than when she had smiled and said she wanted to see her heart. For a moment, Yu Yinan felt as if she could never touch Zheng Yi again, that she would never be able to find her.

Losing her composure, she grabbed that hand and pressed it firmly against her own heart. She heard her own voice, urgent and uneasy, trembling, "Don't leave me."

"Please."

Three months. What had turned Yu Yinan into this? Was this also her true self? Beneath the distant, cold exterior, was she this fragile and easily broken?

"Then what is it that you know?"

"I…" Yu Yinan lowered her gaze, as if she were dissecting herself once more, examining her own heart. She calmed down, tightened her grip on Zheng Yi's hand, and said with earnest stubbornness, "I like you."

"But all of that was fake~ My dear Jiejie, did you actually believe it?" Zheng Yi suddenly laughed, her words exceedingly gentle, as if she were looking at a naive child. "What genuine affection can be built on a foundation of lies?"

"You were fake with me," Yu Yinan also smiled. She looked at Zheng Yi, not letting go of her hand. "But I have always been real with you."

"Zheng Yi, dig out my heart," Yu Yinan's smile grew even gentler. She lowered her eyes. "You're in my heart, you see."

"…" For a rare moment, Zheng Yi fell silent. She studied Yu Yinan's state and suddenly asked, "How long was I asleep?"

"Two days." Yu Yinan didn't press the issue, answering Zheng Yi's question softly.

"Zhu Lanyuan and her squad members have returned. They brought the women you rescued back to the shelter," Yu Yinan sat on the edge of the bed, holding Zheng Yi's hand as she gently recounted the events of the past two days. "No one survived at that base. Zhu Lanyuan didn't say much about what happened there. As for who rescued them… her story is that 'the Saint descended to save them from their suffering,' and the other women believe the same."

"Chu Yi is very concerned about this. She and Yun Lingjian arranged for these people. Yun Lingjian's ability has a healing effect, which also soothes emotions and dispels negative influences. She treated them for free. Some of the women were already pregnant and underwent abortions."

"Zheng Yi, you saved them."

"I just killed some people."

"Yes, you saved them." Yu Yinan blinked, repeating her words gently. "They don't know it was you, but I do. I believe in you. You are the Saint, and you are Zheng Yi."

Zheng Yi pulled her hand from Yu Yinan's grasp and touched her forehead. "Are you sick?"

"If you're sick, then I'm sick," Yu Yinan asked. "Are you sick?"

Zheng Yi didn't feel like talking to Yu Yinan anymore. She threw back the covers to get out of bed, and Yu Yinan quickly grabbed a down jacket from the side and draped it over her shoulders.

"I don't like you," Zheng Yi said, looking up at her with an indifferent tone. "I won't like anyone." Love and affection were boring and useless to her.

"I know." Yu Yinan continued to gaze at her with a gentle smile. "I told you, I will always believe in you, stand by your side, and stay with you."

For a moment, Zheng Yi felt a flicker of irritation. She even had the urge to snap Yu Yinan's neck. But she had always been able to control her emotions. Her fingers itched slightly, but she held back.

"My dear Jiejie, are you really so reluctant to let go of… a little sister you've only just met?" Zheng Yi stepped onto Yu Yinan's shoes with her bare feet, reached up to hook an arm around her neck, and tilted her head back with a smile. "Are you that desperate for affection, that unable to let go?"

Yu Yinan put her hands on Zheng Yi's waist but didn't reply.

Zheng Yi reached out, her fingertip tracing the corner of Yu Yinan's lips, feeling her warm breath. She slowly moved her hand down, from the jaw to the woman's barely noticeable Adam's apple, feeling Yu Yinan swallow nervously. She continued downward, pulling open her clothes to trace her collarbone. "Are you willing to accept someone like me, even if I cross the line with you?"

Yu Yinan bit her lower lip. She looked down at Zheng Yi, still silent, but the tips of her ears were completely red. A pink flush spread across the skin where Zheng Yi's fingers had touched.

The zipper of the down jacket was pulled all the way down. Zheng Yi lifted the hem of her shirt, leaned in, and gently bit Yu Yinan's earlobe, her fingertips brushing against the lines of her abdominal muscles. "Jiejie?"

"If you want to…" Yu Yinan wrapped her arms around Zheng Yi's lower back and rested her chin on her shoulder. Her scorching hot ear brushed against Zheng Yi's cool cheek. She whispered, "You can do anything you want to me."

"You're too foolish." Zheng Yi's tone suddenly turned cold. She pulled her hand back, pushed Yu Yinan away, and walked barefoot toward the living room.

'It's a real shame you didn't bind yourself to Yu Yinan.'

[…] Zero One, which had been flickering in and out of existence from the emotional turmoil of the scene, was finally let out of its dark little room for good. But to be greeted by such words from Zheng Yi… it silently retreated again, pretending not to be there.

Yu Yinan quickly followed, her jacket still unzipped, but she was holding Zheng Yi's shoes. "Don't go barefoot, you'll catch a cold."

In that moment, Zheng Yi, who had decided not to kill Yu Yinan, felt mentally drained for the first time. She turned, took the shoes, and slipped them on. Then she filled a kettle with water, washed her hands, and produced a block of solid alcohol fuel, followed by a can of yellow peaches, a can of beef hot pot, and a can of braised pork.

Making no effort to hide it anymore, she materialized a bag of rice under the table and turned to Yu Yinan. "How much do you know about me?"

"Water-type, storage space, and…" Yu Yinan paused. "A healing ability, I suppose? You were asleep for two days, which can be explained as discomfort from a second ability awakening. You can register the healing ability at the shelter and use it as normal."

Zheng Yi really wanted to perform a craniotomy on Yu Yinan to see what was inside that brain of hers.

"And, recognition as a Saint." Yu Yinan looked at Zheng Yi, not flinching from her gaze, and said seriously, "You need others to recognize you as a Saint from the bottom of their hearts. It's a bit like a transformation-type ability, and you can obtain… something from that recognition to help and strengthen yourself?" Like that puppet, for instance. Of course, Yu Yinan also wondered if this recognition was related to the other abilities Zheng Yi had displayed.

"You have other secrets, things I don't know or understand. You can hide them from me; I won't be curious. You can also tell me, and I won't tell anyone."

But Zheng Yi didn't continue the topic, as if she had only wanted to hear what Yu Yinan knew. She took out the small outdoor generator she had stored away, poured some gasoline into it, and then brought out a rice cooker. "Are you just going to watch?"

"I'll do it." Yu Yinan hurried forward, tore open the bag of rice, and scooped a small bowlful with a clean bowl. She estimated the weight and poured it into the inner pot of the rice cooker, then began to wash it with clean water.

Two cans were opened and set on a small, simple stand to heat up. Zheng Yi sat at the table watching Yu Yinan bustle about. She opened the can of yellow peaches, speared a piece with a fork, and began to eat it slowly.

'You said before that you couldn't see through me.'

Zero One paused for a moment, listening intently to what Zheng Yi had to say.

'Can you see through her?'

[…] Sheepishly, Zero One remained silent.

Had Yu Yinan changed? It seemed she hadn't. But for her to remain unchanged after witnessing such a drastic, shocking transformation in Zheng Yi… that was very strange, wasn't it?

Yu Yinan still seemed like that abandoned puppy, but this time, the person she had encountered was a fake, a liar. In Zero One's eyes, she was an abnormal "Saint," her hands stained with blood, her sins unforgivable.

But Yu Yinan still drew close. Pure, fragile, and fervent, like a moth to a flame, she accepted everything, embraced everything, and exposed her belly to Zheng Yi.

Zero One sensed a touch of the surreal from Yu Yinan as well. It had never seen or encountered anyone like her. It was too unreal.

But what could it say?

[I can't see through you, and now I can't figure out what Yu Yinan is thinking either. I'm a useless system,] Zero One said.

[But, isn't this pretty good, too? She knows the real you. I can't see through either of you, so in that respect… you two are quite a match, aren't you?]

Zheng Yi seemed to let out a sneer as she bit into a piece of syrupy yellow peach.

'And what makes you think that's the real me?'

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