TGSS - Chapter 52

Chapter 52: I Love You

"You said her name is Chu He?" Chu Ze was looking at Liang Zhouyi now as if she were a complete stranger. Hearing this, he shifted his gaze to Chu He and suddenly froze for a moment. This girl bore some resemblance to his mother.

"Do you know her?" Liang Zhouyi's eyes were fixed tightly on Chu Ze, naturally not missing his expression.

"I don't know her." Chu Ze slowly shook his head. "But for some reason, when I saw you appear together, I actually felt a little angry. That's really quite interesting..."

Liang Zhouyi suddenly thought of how unpleasant their parting had been before and felt a little helpless. It was likely that Chu Ze had been too angry at the time, so even if he had forgotten, some emotion still lingered instinctively. Didn't this indirectly prove that feelings could last longer than memory.

"These past days, I feel as if I've had a very long dream." Chu Ze folded his hands, his back held very straight. He seemed to hesitate about whether to say it, observing Chu He carefully before finally saying, "I met a woman named Chu He. I always thought it was a dream, but when I saw you today, the woman in the dream whose face I couldn't see clearly suddenly became distinct."

"Then do you remember what you dreamed about?" Liang Zhouyi pressed.

Chu Ze denied it. He showed a somewhat distant smile. "Sorry, I don't remember any of that at all."

---

After saying goodbye to Chu Ze, Liang Zhouyi finally seemed to stop struggling. She walked dejectedly along the crowded street, like a walking corpse with no idea where to go. Chu He followed close beside her, a little nervously, step by step. They walked for a very long time.

"So how much time is left?" Liang Zhouyi asked abruptly.

Chu He paused, thought for a moment, then answered, "About a month."

"Then why did you make a year-long travel plan?"

Those words seemed to embarrass Chu He a little. "Did I ever tell you that my world is almost no different from this world you are in now? You could even say the timelines are nearly identical. I just... hope that after I go back, I can still walk through the places you have been. If you can follow the plan, maybe I can go to the places you go at the same time. That way I might be able to imagine you are standing right beside me."

Liang Zhouyi looked at her in silence, unable to tell whether she felt a little heartache or a little moved. She gave a self-mocking smile. "Then should I praise you for being so meticulous?"

"You flatter me." Chu He could not help but smile.

"Fine, okay. A month is a month." Liang Zhouyi gritted her teeth, clenching her fists as she said coldly, "Then during this time you have to follow my arrangements."

Finally hearing the answer she wanted, Chu He felt her nose sting. She nodded heavily. "Okay."

Liang Zhouyi did not use the final time to travel as Chu He had initially imagined. She could not bring herself to enjoy the scenery or take photos when she knew time was running out. So she simply took Chu He to many places from her childhood to her adulthood, as if she wanted to bring Chu He along the roads she had once walked alone.

She first took Chu He to a somewhat remote village in town, pointing at the red house and saying, "This kindergarten was my favorite place when I was little. Only here could I briefly find some happiness each day, because as soon as I went home I would face endless quarreling."

Liang Zhouyi and Chu He walked side by side to the somewhat dilapidated wall. The railings had lost their color and were covered in rust. Looking inside, the ground was piled thick with fallen leaves, and all the playground equipment had peeled and faded. Liang Zhouyi reached out to brush away the dust and braced herself against the wall to climb over. Chu He nervously supported her from behind.

Liang Zhouyi pressed her knee against the wall and successfully climbed up. She took a deep breath, spread her arms, and stood on the wall looking down, unable to help sighing, "So this wall is this short."

"Is it closed now?" Chu He looked up at Liang Zhouyi standing on the wall.

"This kindergarten was built by the principal together with her parents. Although it was private, the tuition in our town was very cheap. Later the principal got married and had a child, and then she got leukemia and passed away. Her husband ran off, leaving only her parents to take the child and move away. This place slowly fell into desolation."

Liang Zhouyi paused and continued, "When I heard she was sick, I even thought about becoming a doctor. After all, the principal really helped me a lot."

"And then?"

"Mm... there was no then."

Chu He reached out with her pampered hands to grip the wall, then pushed up and sat on it without a care. Looking at Liang Zhouyi beside her with a forlorn and lost expression, she seemed able, in a daze, to picture a little girl in a dress running here.

"I want to play on that swing." After saying this, Liang Zhouyi suddenly leapt down from the wall without warning, startling Chu He. After steadying herself, Liang Zhouyi pointed at the rusty iron swing and said to Chu He, "You push me."

Chu He let out a long breath, looking helpless. She swung her legs and jumped down from the wall, her feet landing on the yellowed fallen leaves. The thick layer of leaves made the ground soft beneath her. She looked up and saw Liang Zhouyi already sitting on the swing. Her eyes were clear and clean, her expression expectant as she looked at Chu He, as childish as a little kid, as if this could bring her immense joy.

Chu He walked forward slowly. She circled around behind Liang Zhouyi, reached out to hold the chains on both sides, her voice very soft, as if coaxing a child. "Are you ready? I'm going to push now, okay?"

The swing traced an arc through the air, throwing Liang Zhouyi high into the sky. She closed her eyes, feeling the faint itch of wind brushing her cheeks. She did not tell Chu He that, yes, she had actually never sat on this swing before, because it seemed she was not allowed to be happy. She could never compete with anyone for a turn on the swing. In those years, amid her father's beatings and scoldings and her classmates' mocking laughter, she slowly grew up. Later she naturally had many chances to play on other swings, but what you cannot have as a child will trap you for a lifetime.

Liang Zhouyi had also come back here several times. She always just looked and then left it at that. For some reason she had never wanted to sit on this swing again. But this time, with Chu He by her side, she finally understood why she had not wanted to when she came alone before. It was because only now was there someone standing behind her who would also steadily catch her.

The little girl who had been trapped here for many years seemed at this moment to finally be able to break free and walk forward.

Liang Zhouyi took Chu He to many places, the park where she played alone, the quiet bamboo grove, the secluded stream... From these experiences Chu He could piece together a complete Liang Zhouyi, a solitary and quiet girl who had learned to enjoy life on her own. She could live happily even in a tiny world. With the sky high and the sea wide ahead, Liang Zhouyi would surely live even more brilliantly.

When Liang Zhouyi passed a dark alley with Chu He, she said with a touch of nostalgia, "This is where I met Tan Qing."

Chu He looked around curiously. The high walls on both sides of the narrow path made it seem cramped and gloomy, so she asked, "Why did you come here?"

Liang Zhouyi said frankly, "Taking a shortcut here is faster. It let me get home in time for dinner."

But that day she still did not make it in time, because helping Tan Qing, she took several hits herself and naturally got home very late. Her mother put all her heart on her husband and son. In her dictionary there was no such phrase as saving dinner for someone. She simply assumed that if Liang Zhouyi came home late, she would find a way to deal with it herself. But at least she got to know Tan Qing as a friend because of it, so it was not a loss.

Chu He suddenly felt very sad. She could see that during this time Liang Zhouyi had been trying hard to show her past to her. She also understood that Liang Zhouyi hoped she would not forget her, and so she did not hesitate to reopen many scars to let Chu He see more clearly.

At that thought, Chu He suddenly pulled Liang Zhouyi over and hugged her tightly. She certainly had many comforting words she could say, but facing an unknown future she did not dare to make a single promise. All she could do was hold her tightly at this moment.

A month passed quickly. Liang Zhouyi and Chu He tacitly avoided mentioning the passage of time, until one day when they were out shopping, Liang Zhouyi noticed that the people around them seemed unable to see Chu He. In her eyes Chu He was still clearly visible, a living person, yet she was treated as air. Everyone's gaze passed right through her, as if no one but Liang Zhouyi could rest their eyes on Chu He.

This day came even faster than Liang Zhouyi had imagined. She thought she would become hysterical, would be unable to accept it in despair, but surprisingly she was very calm.

During this time Chu He and Liang Zhouyi had moved into the apartment Liang Zhouyi rented. Although the place was small, drawing the curtains revealed a large expanse of blue sky and the bustling traffic.

The weather those few days was exceptionally good, warm as if spring had come early.

At sunset, Chu He wore a thin white shirt as she watered the flowers and plants. Then, all at once, simply looking at Chu He like that made Liang Zhouyi feel as if she had gained her whole world. Her heart felt full to bursting. When Chu He turned back and smiled at her, she was as beautiful as something from a dream. Liang Zhouyi vaguely saw Chu He's red lips move as if saying something, but she could not hear it clearly; she could only stare at Chu He in a daze.

"I said, let's do it."

Chu He repeated it with a smile in her eyes. She put down what she was holding, casually drew the curtains, and slowly undid the buttons of her shirt with her other hand.

Liang Zhouyi was holding a water cup at the time. Hearing this, the cup clattered onto the wooden floor, water spilling everywhere, and the cup rolled away.

Chu He's movements were very slow. Below her fair and delicate collarbones were undulating hills. She did not undo it all the way, just letting the shirt hang loosely on her, the straps of her underwear faintly visible through the white fabric. Her pale face carried a bright temptation. Liang Zhouyi felt as if her feet had taken root, able only to watch as Chu He walked toward her barefoot across the floor.

Gray trousers slowly slipped to the floor. Chu He stepped over the bundle of fabric, walking toward Liang Zhouyi step by step, each step as if treading on Liang Zhouyi's heart.

Liang Zhouyi almost reverently wrapped her arms around Chu He's waist, letting a rain of kisses fall over her eyelashes and lips. A scorching tongue scraped over each of her teeth, almost plundering all the air from her mouth. She bit Chu He's tongue because she could not breathe, but it provoked an even fiercer counterattack. The taste of blood flowed between lips and teeth. It was a somewhat savage kiss. Just one kiss left Liang Zhouyi limp all over. Her vision darkened, and she was supported by Chu He as she sank into the bedding.

She stared blankly at the ceiling. Only a second later, Chu He's face suddenly appeared in her field of vision. Desire had crept across that cool and aloof face, the corners of her eyes flushed a vivid red. She tremblingly reached out to touch the corner of Chu He's eye, unable to help smiling. So beautiful.

Chu He rubbed her fingers in return, the gesture faintly suggestive, a sigh on her lips. She leaned close to Liang Zhouyi's ear, her voice soft and clinging. "Don't worry, I won't hurt you."

Liang Zhouyi's eyes widened for an instant. There was a warm touch rubbing at her thigh. As time passed, it felt as if a fire in her lower abdomen burned straight upward, as if it would not stop until it burned her to ash.

"Chu He..." Liang Zhouyi weakly gripped Chu He's hand, tears glistening at the corners of her eyes. Chu He lowered her head to kiss the tears away, a string of kisses falling on her neck and collarbones. She could only clutch Chu He's long hair, letting the person on top of her entwine tightly around her legs.

After a long while Chu He finally raised her head. She pulled her hand out and held it up to the light. Her pale pink nails had been trimmed very smooth. She licked her lips and smiled like rippling water.

Liang Zhouyi's face was flushed. Looking at Chu He under the light, she always felt that at this moment she was both like an angel come to save her and like a demon tempting her, wanting to drag her into the abyss. There was a bewitching allure about her that seemed to seize the soul. She closed her eyes to feel this throbbing. At the most extreme moment she vaguely thought of the relationship between Chu He and herself, and the strange subtlety gave her an even more peculiar sensation. She tried to lift her waist to get closer to Chu He, to kiss those red lips, rich and soft, never enough no matter how much she kissed.

Outside the window, it began to rain at some unknown time. Drizzling raindrops fell on the flowers and plants, wetting the petals. They trembled as if unable to bear it. Fine threads of rain fell densely over the whole flower, revealing the stamen at the very center, looking very lovely.

The fine rain fell all night, until it finally stopped in the early morning.

When Liang Zhouyi woke up, she instinctively reached out to feel beside her, but felt no one. She propped herself up and sat up, finding Chu He sitting on the bay window with her chin in her hand, her long legs dangling down, the white shirt on her looking somewhat transparent. She seemed to sense Liang Zhouyi's gaze, turned her head and smiled very gently. That fair and beautiful arm pulled open the curtains, and brilliant sunlight suddenly poured in, making Liang Zhouyi close her eyes. With tears in her eyes she looked out, and a large expanse of blue sky came into view.

"Liang Zhouyi, do you see?" Chu He's exquisite face was blurred by the sunlight, her whole figure caught between light and shadow. Her voice was light but firm. "Go on, run hard toward your future."

And I will walk with you in another world. If one day we are lucky enough to meet again... then I will tell you, I love you, more than anyone else in the world loves you.

Love grew wildly at this moment. We share the purest connection. Perhaps neither of us can fall in love with anyone else, but we will always be drawn to each other. Even if we are left behind in different times and spaces, as long as we meet, it will be love at first sight that lasts a lifetime.

I love you, without any reason needed.

Liang Zhouyi blinked hard. Watching Chu He, whose body had begun to turn transparent in the sunlight, her breathing stalled.

Chu He looked at her with a faint smile, still leaning lazily by the window, her voice a little hollow. "Zhou Yi, I want to eat the soft-boiled eggs from the shop downstairs. Will you go buy some for me?"

"Okay."

Liang Zhouyi's voice trembled. She agreed very quickly, hardly daring to look at Chu He again, quickly getting up to tidy herself. Only at the last moment when closing the door, as if reluctant to shut it, she took one last deep look at Chu He's figure through the crack of the door.

It was not long before Liang Zhouyi came back carrying breakfast. As she gripped the door handle, she suddenly felt a pang in her heart. A huge sense of panic filled her chest. She bit her lip and pushed the door open. The wind instantly blew the curtains up. Liang Zhouyi looked unconsciously toward the window. It was empty there. She clutched the plastic bag tightly, her expression a little bewildered. Why had she opened the window so wide?

Feeling it was somewhat inexplicable, Liang Zhouyi casually put the things on the table, walked over to close the window, and when she saw the little potted plants on the sill, her heart softened slightly. She carefully pushed them inward, to prevent herself from accidentally knocking them over when closing the window.

After doing all this, she subconsciously pressed a hand to her chest, as if the air had grown thin. Otherwise why was it so hard for her to breathe? She returned to the table in a daze, mechanically pulled out a chair and sat down. When she saw the lunchbox full of food, that strange feeling rose to its peak. Why had she bought so much today?

And she never ate soft-boiled eggs, so why had she bought one?

But in the end Liang Zhouyi still ate that egg. Sure enough, it was not tasty at all. As she ate, her eyes filled with tears. By the time she realized it, tears had already cooled her cheeks. Liang Zhouyi always felt this egg was a little bitter, so she gulped down a large mouthful of soy milk. Good, even the soy milk was bitter. How strange, it was so bitter it made her cry.

She just sat at the table eating the breakfast bite by bite, eating until she felt uncomfortably full, then stared fixedly at the bay window, as if a person might appear there.

Liang Zhouyi belatedly wiped the tears from her face. She seemed to have forgotten something, but it must have been something very important. Otherwise why would she feel so restless in her heart, so restless that her whole body began to ache, as if even deep in her bones she was being gnawed away.

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