IVYSCP - Chapter 123
Chapter 123
"Impossible."
Chu Qianshan lowered her eyes. A self-deprecating smile tugged at the corner of her lips. "How could you have come back for me? You clearly didn't even want to see me."
Her vision began to blur. Chu Qianshan blinked. Through the haze of tears, a figure in brocade robes appeared right in front of her. Pei Congyi had come to her.
Chu Qianshan jolted in shock, instinctively stepping back to put distance between them, but her wrist was already caught in an unyielding grip.
The woman's hand against her skin brought a chill, yet Chu Qianshan felt as if she were being burned. The sensation jolted her into trying to shake free, but no matter how she struggled, she couldn't break loose. It was just like when she was a child walking the paths of Cangshan, throwing a tantrum over a sweet fruit and refusing to go home with Pei Congyi. Pei Congyi had simply laughed and dragged her straight back.
Unable to break free, Chu Qianshan stopped fighting it.
Silence stretched between them.
Until Chu Qianshan could no longer bear the tension. She finally lifted her head to look at the person before her. The tears she had fought so hard to hold back now rimmed her eyes with red. All the imperious authority she usually carried had vanished completely. "You're always like this. You do whatever you want. You leave when you want and come back when you want. Just because you're my master, I have to obey you?"
Pei Congyi lifted a hand and brushed it gently across the corner of Chu Qianshan's eye. "So you won't listen to me anymore?" she asked softly.
Chu Qianshan fell silent.
Up on Little Cangshan, it was Pei Yin, outwardly so respectful and proper, who never listened to their master. And it was Chu Qianshan, with her fierce temper and impulsive whims, who was the most obedient of all.
Thinking back to all the times Pei Yin had defied her in the past, Chu Qianshan gritted her teeth and shot back, "That's right. I'm done listening to you."
She was going to play the rebellious disciple for once.
After shouting at Pei Congyi, an unexpected sense of release coursed through Chu Qianshan. She suddenly understood, a little, why Pei Yin was always so defiant toward her.
Pei Congyi, however, saw right through her. She patted Chu Qianshan lightly on the head, laughing. "How old are you now? Don't go imitating Xiao Yin."
Chu Qianshan's face immediately flushed scarlet. She started struggling again at once. "Let go of me!"
Pei Congyi stepped forward and pulled her into an embrace, patting her gently on the back. "Alright, alright. It was my fault. I apologize."
The instant Pei Congyi held her, Chu Qianshan went rigid as wood. Even her eyes stopped moving.
Pei Congyi was hugging her.
That fragrance she yearned for day and night filled her senses. The woman's gentle, soothing voice murmured in her ear. A sour ache bloomed behind Chu Qianshan's eyes, and she couldn't help thinking, You already know how I feel about you, and you still hold me like this. Do you still see me as nothing more than that obedient, well-behaved disciple who used to trail behind you every day?
Chu Qianshan squeezed her eyes shut. Tears slid down her cheeks and fell onto the woman's shoulder, soaking the fabric.
She drew a deep breath, pulled back from Pei Congyi's arms, and then dropped straight to her knees.
A flicker of shock crossed Pei Congyi's eyes. "You..."
Chu Qianshan pressed her forehead to the floor. Her voice came out hoarse. "Your disciple has committed an unforgivable transgression, a capital offense against you. Please, Master, deliver your punishment. Cast me out of the sect."
She didn't want to keep drifting in this ambiguous, unclear, inexplicable space any longer.
A gust of wind swept past. Amidst her churning fear and anxiety, Chu Qianshan heard the woman give a soft laugh. It sounded like anger.
"Get up." Pei Congyi's voice had turned cold.
Chu Qianshan kept her forehead pressed to the ground and did not move.
The two remained locked in a stalemate. In the end, it was Pei Congyi who half-crouched down. She stared at the back of Chu Qianshan's head and, at last, spoke aloud a truth she had once been too afraid to face. "That night... I wasn't drunk."
It had, in fact, been something she allowed to happen.
Chu Qianshan's head snapped up. Undisguised shock filled her eyes.
Pei Congyi looked down at her, a smile of release on her face. "Qianshan, I raised you with my own hands. The way you look at me, how it changed slowly from respect and affection into love... I knew. I could see you were harboring feelings that went beyond master and disciple. I didn't know how to talk to you about it. I was afraid I would hurt you. After all, it was the first time you had ever fallen for someone."
"Afraid of hurting me?"
Chu Qianshan could no longer hold back her tears. So Pei Congyi didn't feel the same way. She only ever saw them as master and disciple. It was Chu Qianshan who had crossed the line back then and driven Pei Congyi away.
She turned her head away, refusing to cry in front of Pei Congyi, and yelled at her fiercely, "I don't need you to be so considerate on my behalf. If you had told me sooner, I wouldn't have fallen for you. I could go fall for someone else!"
Pei Congyi's expression shifted. She pinched Chu Qianshan's chin and turned her face back toward her. "Someone else? Who are you going to fall for? Is there someone else you like?"
Chu Qianshan laughed and brought up another matter. "You've been gone for over a hundred years now, you know."
A hundred-plus years wasn't long for a cultivator, but it wasn't short either. It was more than enough time for old love to fade and new affection to bloom.
"Liar." Pei Congyi caught the evasion flickering in her eyes. Her own moment of disordered breathing steadied. She rubbed her fingertips gently against Chu Qianshan's chin and said in a low voice, "You've picked up bad habits from Xiao Yin."
Chu Qianshan glared at her, inwardly fuming. How could Pei Congyi know her so well? The woman could tell what she was thinking from a single look, a single gesture.
"I'm not finished talking yet. Don't go flying into a rage," Pei Congyi said, wiping the tears from Chu Qianshan's face as she continued where she had left off. "At first, I really did want you to let go of those feelings..."
Seeing Chu Qianshan was about to flare up again, Pei Congyi suddenly leaned in close. Their faces were nearly touching. Chu Qianshan instantly froze.
"But then, I found myself harboring selfish desires of my own. I didn't want the look in your eyes when you gazed at me to disappear. I didn't want you to stop clinging to me or drawing near. It was I who deceived myself, suppressing this budding affection, until that jar of Jade Spirit Intoxication arrived at Little Cangshan. Jade Spirit Intoxication can intoxicate the very soul. It is also a potent medicine for cleansing the spirit. I divided the Jade Spirit Intoxication in half. You drank yours clean, then threw yourself at me, wanting to kiss me, wanting... "
Chu Qianshan was so mortified listening to this that she couldn't bear it. She squeezed her eyes shut and gritted out, "Stop."
"I didn't drink mine. I fed the other half to you as well. I was perfectly clear-headed, and yet I didn't stop you. I let you hold me, kiss me, commit those unforgivably disrespectful acts against me. I knew, with perfect clarity, that I too had developed feelings I should never have had. For a child I had raised with my own hands." Pei Congyi's voice was no longer steady. She drew a soft breath. "My Dao heart fell into chaos. I was nearly overcome by cultivation deviation. I didn't want you to see it. And I didn't want to face you either. So I left Cangshan. I had Xiao Yin pass on the message that I was traveling and that my return was uncertain."
Chu Qianshan felt completely unmoored, not just in her mind, but in her heart as well.
When she had woken up that day, she found herself in her master's bedchamber, clothes disheveled. Their ritual robes were scattered messily beside the bed. She could still taste her master's scent lingering in her mouth.
What had happened was obvious. But the person had fled.
For a very long time, Chu Qianshan had believed she was the one who had committed an unforgivable transgression. That Pei Congyi could not accept such feelings and so had gone traveling to avoid her. She had never imagined that she was the one who had frightened Pei Congyi into running away.
"Then... this time, coming back...?" Chu Qianshan's voice was very soft. Her hand clutched tightly at the woman's sleeve, terrified that Pei Congyi might run off for another hundred years now that their feelings had been laid bare.
Pei Congyi glanced down at the grip on her sleeve and raised an eyebrow. "Afraid I'll run off again?"
Chu Qianshan just looked at her without speaking. Her eyes said everything.
Yes. Afraid you'll run.
Pei Congyi pulled her into an embrace once more and promised, "I won't run away this time."
Chu Qianshan finally lifted her arms and hugged her back. Then, with a sudden surge, she rose and pushed the woman down onto the floor, hands braced on either side. She asked, "Why? Aren't you afraid your Dao heart will waver again?"
Pei Congyi looked up at her and gave her answer. "Traveling for a hundred years, from the Immortal Realm to the Mortal Realm, I witnessed all the myriad forms of existence. Most of it was filled with regret. Looking back over the past several centuries, the only one who could evoke a sense of regret in me... is you."
Chu Qianshan laughed. She lowered her head, drawing closer bit by bit, only to stop at the very last moment, handing the decision over.
A hand pressed against the back of her neck. The remaining distance between them vanished entirely.
Chu Qianshan closed her eyes. Her whole body trembled. She traced the soft lips with exquisite care, wanting to bite down fiercely and vent all the anger in her heart, yet unable to bear doing so. Caught between these two warring impulses, she was driven to tears. She wept bitterly, the salt-sour taste of her tears blending into their kiss, ineffably poignant.
"I hate you."
Pei Congyi saw her face drenched in tears, those tears still falling like rain onto her own face. Her heart clenched with a sharp, wrenching pain.
"Alright. Hate me, then." Pei Congyi held her, stroking her back gently, and murmured into her ear, "But how long are you going to hate me?"
Chu Qianshan's voice came out muffled against Pei Congyi's neck. "A hundred years."
Pei Congyi had run away for a hundred years. She was going to hate her for a hundred years in return.
A gentle pat landed on the back of her head. Chu Qianshan heard Pei Congyi laugh.
"So petty."
Qiu Feng followed the traces of aura all the way to Medicine Peak. When she spotted the familiar treehouse in the distance, her breathing grew lighter.
Step by step, she drew closer.
"Hey? Who are you?"
A head suddenly popped up from within the medicinal field, its owner staring at Qiu Feng with a puzzled expression.
Immediately afterward, the wooden door of the treehouse slammed open with a violent bang. An invisible force reached out across the distance and yanked Qiu Feng straight inside.
Qiu Feng stumbled, righting herself just as the wooden door slammed shut behind her. She lifted her gaze to the person seated at the table, and her throat seized up, blocking every word.
Gu Huai's face was taut with fury. She stared coldly at Qiu Feng. "Why aren't you dead? Why did you come back with Ling Qingyue?"
"Back then, we used the Seven-Aperture Exquisite Heart to help regenerate your residual soul. You agreed to the sacrificial array. So what are you doing now? Do you want to make everything everyone sacrificed be in vain?!"
"Without obtaining the complete Seven-Aperture Exquisite Heart, how can Ling Qingyue possibly kill Lou Wudu?! How can she get her revenge?!"
Gu Huai looked as if she had been pushed past the limits of her rage. She surged to her feet and stormed over to Qiu Feng, her hand already rising to strike.
"Immortal Maiden."
The hand halted just in time. Gu Huai frowned at her. "What did you just call me?"
Tears welled in Qiu Feng's eyes. She forced a smile onto her face with visible effort. "Immortal Maiden, let me help you gather the dew."
Gu Huai's entire body jolted as if struck. A young, halting, fragmented voice echoed from the depths of memory.
"Im... Immortal Maiden, gathering dew... I'll help you."
"How do you know about that?" Gu Huai pressed. "Who told you?"
Qiu Feng lowered her head. "I'm sorry. I deceived you back then. I'm not some cultivator descended from an immortal sect. I myself am a half-demon, born from the Demon Lord's blood. I didn't die at the Liuyun Immortal Sect. Lou Wudu wanted to use me to destroy Yue Zhiwei's soul. But Yue Zhiwei, at the moment of her annihilation, used the Heavenly Divination Art to hide me inside her corpse. That's how my residual soul managed to survive."
Gu Huai nearly collapsed. Qiu Feng hurriedly reached out to steady her.
"Ah Mu?" Gu Huai asked in disbelief. "You're Ah Mu?"
Qiu Feng nodded. "Yes."
Gu Huai's eyes reddened as well. "You're still alive. Why didn't you tell me?"
Qiu Feng was Ah Mu. But in their plan, Qiu Feng had been a dead piece on the board, meant to be discarded.
"If I had told you, would you have agreed?"
Back then, to successfully infiltrate the Great Wilderness, they had needed someone familiar with half-demons, someone who had studied them and could suppress their demonic traits.
There was only one such person in the entire world.
But if Gu Huai had known Qiu Feng was Ah Mu, she would never have agreed to let Ah Mu become the vessel and complete the sacrifice.
"Did the Hidden Moon Lord know about this?" Gu Huai asked softly.
"...She knew."
Comments
Post a Comment