Indulgence - Chapter 75
Chapter 75
Jiang Nian indeed hadn't deliberately dressed in a more mature style again. She had promised Yao Ran she wouldn't lie to her anymore. She also hoped that Yao Ran would fall for the real her, not the facade she had put on…
Their soft gazes met, the distance between them ambiguous.
Though her heart itched at that moment, Jiang Nian behaved herself. She lowered her head and helped Yao Ran unbuckle her seatbelt.
Yao Ran turned her head slightly, and the distance between them surreptitiously widened again.
Jiang Nian offered to walk her upstairs.
Yao Ran was silent for a moment. She couldn't drive because she'd been drinking, but she wasn't so drunk that she couldn't get home on her own. However, she looked at Jiang Nian and, in the end, didn't refuse.
The two of them stood together in the less-than-spacious elevator. No one else got in, and the elevator ascended at a steady, quiet pace.
The mirrored walls reflected their two figures, a gap of about half a person's width still between them. The feeling was awkward. Both were silent on the surface, but their minds had wandered in unison.
In the past, whenever they were alone in the elevator, Jiang Nian would always love to cling to Yao Ran, burying her face in the crook of her neck to steal a few kisses. Yao Ran would tell her to behave, but she would let her be mischievous. Lost in thought, they soon arrived at her floor.
As they reached the door, Jiang Nian spoke up. "Did you receive the little dog figurines I sent you?"
Yao Ran nodded. "Mhm."
Although Jiang Nian was eager for her to stop being angry, she didn't press the matter.
She had figured it out. Perhaps pestering and pleading could soften Yao Ran's heart, but she didn't want to win her back that way. She hoped that after careful consideration, Yao Ran would still be willing to like the person she was now.
Jiang Nian took an admission ticket from her bag and placed it in her hand. "For you."
"What is it?" Yao Ran asked.
"A ticket to an art exhibition from a friend. She saved two for me a long time ago, and one of them is yours," Jiang Nian said. It was from before their breakup; a friend had given her two tickets and told her to bring her girlfriend along.
Now, the exhibition was about to open, but they had separated.
Yao Ran remembered this. Jiang Nian had mentioned it to her before; it was an exhibition Jiang Nian had long wanted to see. At the time, she had promised to go with her.
"It's okay if you come or not…" Jiang Nian added, explaining, "Since one of them is yours, I'm just giving it to you."
It's mine. Yao Ran clutched the ticket in her hand. That day, she had seen how enthusiastically Jiang Nian and Mimi were chatting about the exhibition and had assumed Jiang Nian would give the ticket to someone else…
After standing there for a moment, Jiang Nian didn't go in. Instead, she said, "You should head in. I'm leaving." With that, she turned and left.
Jiang Nian drove back alone, thinking, Yao Ran will probably come to the exhibition this weekend, right? She couldn't help but recall what Yao Qi had told her—that Director Yao treasured the little dog figurines she had sent…
The art exhibition started at eight o'clock on Saturday evening. A large crowd had gathered outside the art museum ahead of time.
Winter was approaching, so the sky darkened early, but tonight, many stars hung in the night sky, creating a romantic and beautiful scene.
Jiang Nian also arrived early. After waiting at the entrance for about five minutes, she caught sight of Yao Ran's figure. Her heart sped up slightly, and a smile immediately bloomed on her lips.
Although she had told Yao Ran that night, "It's okay if you come or not," deep down, she had of course been hoping Yao Ran would be willing to come.
And she had waited.
Yao Ran walked toward the entrance, her pace slowing slightly. She looked up and saw Jiang Nian smiling in her direction from not far away, standing out in the crowd.
A north wind had picked up in the evening, and it was chilling.
When Jiang Nian saw Yao Ran approach, her smile grew even brighter. This feeling of meeting by tacit understanding without having made any plans was exceptionally delightful and surprising.
Her eyes were curved into crescents from smiling so much. Only then did Yao Ran realize that even Jiang Nian's smiles had been restrained before; now, they were clearly more unrestrained and playful…
As she got closer, Yao Ran noticed that the tip of Jiang Nian's nose was red from the cold wind. She said in a low voice, "Why didn't you go inside?"
Jiang Nian was still looking at her with smiling eyes. After a good while, she whispered the truth from her heart: "I was waiting for you."
Her smile was both sweet and silly. Yao Ran lowered her head and urged her, "Let's go in."
Many couples were at the exhibition, and from time to time, people would walk past them with their fingers intertwined. Jiang Nian saw them and thought that if they hadn't broken up, they would probably be just as clingy and sweet.
But at least she came tonight, Jiang Nian thought, feeling secretly fortunate.
It was still early after they finished viewing the exhibition. Jiang Nian asked Yao Ran, "Want to take a walk around campus?"
Q University was right next to the art museum, just a few minutes' walk away. Coincidentally, both of them had graduated from Q University with their bachelor's degrees.
Hearing Jiang Nian's suggestion, Yao Ran looked at her, recalling the way she used to spout nonsense, even saying with such a straight face that she was only two years her junior. By now, it had to be eight or nine years apart.
Realizing something, Jiang Nian felt guilty under her gaze and obediently admitted her mistake with her eyes.
Yao Ran was still angry just thinking about it, but she had to admit Jiang Nian had a point. If she had known Jiang Nian's real age from the start, she absolutely would not have let things get so ambiguous between them. Not to mention, they had met because they slept together…
"Let's go," Jiang Nian said softly, looking at her.
After strolling outside the art museum for a while, the two of them ended up at the entrance of Q University.
Yao Ran hadn't been back to campus since she graduated many years ago. The street names were still familiar, but the scenery had long since become strange.
Jiang Nian had only graduated a little over two years ago, so she was relatively more familiar with the place. They entered through the nearest gate and ran into students getting out of their evening classes, the air bustling with youthful energy.
The campus grounds were also covered in fallen leaves. Jiang Nian stepped on the dry leaves on the ground, turning her head as she walked to ask Yao Ran, "It's been a long time since you've been here, hasn't it?"
Yao Ran glanced around. "Mhm."
"I come by occasionally. There's a really good barbecue place over here," Jiang Nian chatted with a smile.
Yao Ran's gaze swept over Jiang Nian's side profile. She fell silent for a moment, lost in thought. In a setting like this, the age gap between them was even more visually apparent. It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say Jiang Nian still looked like a student. She thought about how she used to tease Ruan Xin, but now, looking at herself, she wasn't much better…
Jiang Nian turned back and found Yao Ran looking at her. "What's wrong?"
Yao Ran's gaze flickered away. "Nothing."
But Jiang Nian pressed, "Come on, tell me."
So Yao Ran told her, "You look like you haven't graduated yet."
Jiang Nian was at a loss for words for a moment, feeling as if she was being called too young again. She muttered, "I'm not that young, really. Aren't Director Ruan and Xu Xia a good match?"
"..."
Now it was Yao Ran's turn to be speechless.
As they wandered past the athletic field, Jiang Nian found a place to sit and rest. She saw an adult playing soccer with a child on the field and smiled, unable to help but sigh, "My parents were both busy with work, so they never played with me like that when I was little. After they divorced, there was no one to spend time with me at all."
Yao Ran looked over and saw that her eyes were filled with envy.
"Because of that, I'm especially afraid of being lonely. I hate being by myself. I've loved making lots of friends ever since I was a child." Jiang Nian turned back to look at her and continued, "It's the same now that I'm grown up. I just hope there's always someone with me…"
Yao Ran thought for a moment, then said calmly but pointedly, "So you flirt with everyone?"
"I…" Jiang Nian found herself unable to refute it, yet she felt wronged. She had flirted with many people in the past, but the only person she had ever truly pursued was the one before her now. The only one who had ever made her heart race was Yao Ran. Only after meeting her did she understand that when you truly like someone, your heart can keep racing for them forever.
"I used to really want to be in a relationship, thinking that if I was, I'd have someone by my side. So I did get to know quite a few 'older sisters' before."
Yao Ran couldn't help but frown, not knowing what to say. No wonder she was so skilled when she was pursuing her.
"But I never met anyone I wanted to be with…" Jiang Nian had long wanted to seriously explain this to Yao Ran, afraid she would keep misunderstanding and hold a grudge. She looked at Yao Ran with a wry smile. "You probably won't believe me if I say it, but you're the only person I've ever shamelessly pursued…"
Yao Ran looked at her and thought to herself, So she knows she was shameless.
Jiang Nian's expression dimmed. She probably doesn't believe me, does she? It sounds like I'm just making excuses.
The distant athletic field was noisy and bustling with people running and playing ball, but their corner was quiet, their soft voices mingling with the wind.
Yao Ran was thinking about something. Following Jiang Nian's line of thought, she asked, "Did you pursue me because you were too lonely?"
Jiang Nian immediately shook her head. "If it was because of loneliness, anyone would have done. But I only want to be with you. I just like the feeling of being with you. I can't really explain why, but I like everything we do together. I like you being with me, and I like that you need me."
Her confessions to Yao Ran had always been sincere, without a single lie.
It was the first time she had ever liked someone this much.
Yao Ran listened in silence.
Jiang Nian knew very well that her feelings for Yao Ran were different from her feelings for others. When she used to flirt with people, she only wanted to be taken care of, or to have someone to pass the time with. But with Yao Ran, she wanted to learn how to take care of another person, always thinking of ways to make her happy.
"I don't usually think much about the future. You were right, I didn't think about it enough before. But I wasn't with you just because I was bored and wanted a relationship as a pastime…" As Jiang Nian said this, she thought of Yao Ran's words during their breakup. Her eyes stung, and she felt like crying again, but she forced herself to hold it back.
The wind was strong that night, kicking up some dust in the air.
When another gust of wind blew by, something got in Jiang Nian's eye, and tears immediately welled up. She blinked, uncomfortable.
Seeing this, Yao Ran reached out and cupped her cheek. "Let me see."
"Mhm," Jiang Nian answered obediently. As her face was turned, they were now face to face, very close. Seeing Yao Ran lean in to check on her with such gentle concern, her heart melted in an instant. She couldn't help but let out a plaintive whimper. "You're finally willing to pay attention to me?"
Comments
Post a Comment