TBTTSP - Chapter 31

Chapter 31: Shang Yi Has a Story (13)

The dirt on Xu Min had been backed up several times on a hard drive, a bargaining chip Shang Yi could throw on the table at any moment.

Shang Yi didn't know if her opponent at the gambling table was the Big Boss or Xu Min herself. In any case, the Xus were all clueless fools when it came to emotions. Caught between this father-daughter pair, Shang Yi played the part of the ingratiating sycophant, wearing a radiant smile every day while secretly sharpening her knives.

Feelings were such a childish thing, or so Shang Yi believed.

She drove to Xu Wanqing's building herself. She had arranged for Xu Wanqing to move between several of her secret properties. Looking up from downstairs, she felt like she was hiding a treasured beauty in a secret love nest, and the feeling wasn't bad.

That immortality pill of unknown origin had been delivered into her mouth by the Xu Wanqing of unknown origin with a kiss of unknown origin. If this had been the old Shang Yi, even one unknown factor would have been enough for her to nip the trouble in the bud.

But she had kissed back, and it had felt good. In the long expanse of her memory, that kiss had fermented and brewed, transforming into something new.

She had to admit that Xu Wanqing was a little different to her, just as Ugly Boy was certainly easier on the eyes than the Big Boss's assistant she'd slept with.

A sense of unease surfaced, and she found herself afraid to get closer. Shang Yi believed that feelings always had to involve some kind of exchange—money, power, or a night of pleasure. It couldn't just be love for love's sake. Shang Yi graded her favorable impressions on a scale from A to E, but after weighing it, she found that this strange feeling she had for Xu Wanqing couldn't be graded. It could only be relegated to a dark room for separate consideration.

She went upstairs.

The elevator doors opened directly opposite the apartment. Just then, Xu Wanqing suddenly threw the door open, as if she had been waiting at the peephole for a long time. Shang Yi jumped in surprise.

"What's going on?"

"I opened the door to the wrong person last time… so I came to check early this time."

"It's fine."

The matter of Xu Wanqing opening the door for Xu Min could be a big deal or a small one. Ultimately, Shang Yi's precautions were to protect Xu Wanqing, yet the person in question looked apologetic, as if she had caused Shang Yi trouble. The five-hundred-year-old woman had been blaming herself for a long time, seeming to shrink every time she saw her.

Shang Yi had just stepped inside and changed into something more comfortable, ready to wave her hand and take Xu Wanqing out for hot pot. But as she came hopping out with her socks on, her eyes fell on two dripping wet pots hanging in the never-used kitchen, and she changed her mind.

Yesterday, Xu Wanqing had been learning how to use the gas stove. She had studied the instruction manual for a long time and, being quite clever, had figured out how to turn on the flame. But that was the limit for someone from ancient times. Shang Yi pointed to a pot that hadn't been fully washed. "What's in there?"

"Beef and taro."

The bottom of the pot was scorched black, as if Xu Wanqing had tossed the beef and taro into hell.

"And this one?"

"Dough drop soup."

"…"

Shang Yi turned on the faucet, and water rushed out. Xu Wanqing had probably spent the morning painstakingly scrubbing those two pots. They looked clean, but they gave off the weary air of having survived a disaster. Three other pots of varying sizes were soaking in the sink. Shang Yi tried scrubbing one with a dainty grip, but after a moment, she gave up in defeat. She dried the pots and stuffed them into a large paper bag. "Let's go. We're buying new pots."

"…" Knowing she was in the wrong, Xu Wanqing didn't dare say a word.

"Don't touch this anymore. It's dangerous. You should use this…" Shang Yi placed a thin soup pot on the induction cooker, plugged it in, pressed a few buttons to turn it on, then turned it off again, completing the demonstration.

Xu Wanqing was one hell of a woman, not even afraid of dying in a gas leak.

"Is Younger Sister Shang angry with me?"

"Who's angry with you… What are you thinking?"

Xu Wanqing didn't answer, merely staring at the induction cooker as if she wanted to master it immediately to prove her usefulness to Shang Yi.

Shang Yi ordered Haidilao for delivery. While they waited for the delivery guy to knock, Xu Wanqing was restless. Shang Yi rested her head on a sofa cushion and crookedly kicked her leg onto Xu Wanqing's, as if casting a spell to hold her in place.

Everyone has moments of self-pity, and even a titan like the Big Boss was no exception. When he was feeling down and blaming himself, Shang Yi would wrap her arms around his neck and comfort him with sweet, soft words. It always worked. An eager embrace, the tangible warmth of another person, would bring a sense of peace.

But Shang Yi felt that using the same tactic on Xu Wanqing would be a kind of profanity. She was genuinely starting to feel something, and though it was just the beginning, she didn't want to use a conventional, pre-written answer.

It was like knowing the answers to a university exam in advance. During the test, she could just fill in the memorized answers, but they wouldn't be her own work. It would feel like cheating, dishonest.

Even if deviating from the standard answer meant she would fail and have to retake the course, she still wanted to give an answer that came from her own heart.

She moved her body as slowly as a snail, then sat up with a push of her waist, lying horizontally across Xu Wanqing's lap.

Her posture was so improper, lying there with no regard for graceful etiquette, but Xu Wanqing didn't chide her as she usually would. She only lowered her head slowly, her gaze lingering on Shang Yi's body, looking dejected. A wave of self-blame washed over her, and Xu Wanqing was powerless to resist it.

If Zhang Xu were standing here, wallowing in self-pity, Shang Yi would have had a ready answer. But with Xu Wanqing sitting here, she was always reminded that she herself was just a bright, delicate flower in someone else's arms, a flower for display. The flower was owned by someone but could not choose its master.

Her feelings could only be locked away in her little dark room for separate accounting.

The delivery guy arrived, laid everything out, and left. Shang Yi poured the bone broth into the pot. Xu Wanqing followed behind her, watching slowly. She learned how to open the food containers, arranging the marinated chicken feet and duck webs neatly. The beef, lamb, basa fish, and shrimp paste were opened one by one. Shang Yi was starting to feel a little full already.

But she opened them all anyway. The induction cooker hummed, and Xu Wanqing, in heavy silence, pried open a container with a pop.

Shang Yi prepared a bowl of oil-based dipping sauce and a bowl of sesame paste sauce and placed them in front of Xu Wanqing. Sitting opposite her, Xu Wanqing looked a bit dazed. Her gaze softened slightly, and she offered a reserved smile. "It arrives just as you say it will. This place is truly bustling… Younger Sister Shang, you truly amaze me."

"Any modern person could do this. I'm not special."

Steam rose and billowed up, forming a curtain between her and Xu Wanqing.

"It's really okay, you know. That woman the other day, her name is Xu Min. She's… how do I put this? Let me start from the beginning."

"Mm."

"In your era, I'd probably be something like a… concubine. The kind you could buy for three hundred taels of silver. I'm the concubine of a… very wealthy man. Of course, we don't have concubines here. I'm a secret mistress, the kind who ruins families. A third party."

"How does a concubine ruin a family?" Xu Wanqing asked, once again confused.

"We're not allowed to keep concubines here. It's illegal. You'd be drowned in a pig cage for it."

Xu Wanqing's face turned deathly pale. "Younger Sister Shang, are you in some kind of unspeakable difficulty?"

Unspeakable difficulty? Had Xu Wanqing concocted some tragic drama in her head about Shang Yi selling herself to pay for her father's burial?

Shang Yi couldn't help but laugh. She started putting food into the pot, waiting for the water to boil and tumble the ingredients around before placing some meat in Xu Wanqing's bowl. Modern tastes were heavy. Shang Yi's chopsticks stirred the healthy-looking bone broth, which was dotted with red dates and longans, for a moment before she fished out a vegetable leaf and put it in her own bowl. "No, that was a bad analogy. I'm probably more like a… prostitute. You know, a woman of the night. Understand now?"

Startled by the word, Xu Wanqing gently set down her chopsticks. "I have no desire to know what Younger Sister Shang's status was in the past…"

"But that's my status right now."

Even with Xu Wanqing's scholarly background and good temperament, she couldn't immediately accept that this was Shang Yi's identity!

Shang Yi could guess from her expression that a tempest was raging in her heart…

She helped herself to the food, and Xu Wanqing's bowl piled higher and higher, yet she didn't touch her chopsticks.

"I want money, and he wants a woman, so we made an exchange. It was a mutual agreement, no unspeakable difficulties. That Xu Min I mentioned earlier is my… um, my patron's daughter. She came to condemn me for the crime of ruining her family."

Xu Wanqing's eyes flickered, as if a thousand thoughts had flashed through her mind. In the end, she swallowed them all, and as if she had made a decision, she gently picked up a piece of duck intestine and placed it in Shang Yi's bowl. "What is to be done about this?"

"…Huh?"

"If she catches you, won't your reputation be ruined? Who else knows of this matter?"

Was Xu Wanqing taking her side? Shang Yi chewed on the duck intestine. A stool scraped lightly as Xu Wanqing stood up and moved to Shang Yi's side. From somewhere, she produced a small, round, jade-colored ball and took Shang Yi's hand. "Younger Sister Shang, one pill can grant a hundred years. I gave you the last one. Take this one. I have made inquiries, and there is no such divine medicine in this modern world. If you take it to sell, you will surely be able to buy your freedom…"

Divine medicine! A business opportunity!

"How many more do you have?"

"If I had more, I would give them all to you. If this is not enough, I have no other way."

Shang Yi paused.

She remembered that not long after they met, Xu Wanqing had mentioned she only had two hundred years left. If one pill was worth a hundred years, then Xu Wanqing had none left now. Was she going to die?

She really was a calculating merchant, thinking about making money even at a time like this.

Shame washed over her. She gently placed the pill back in Xu Wanqing's hand. "You eat it. I don't need it."

"If Younger Sister Shang cannot buy her freedom, what use is there in me living on…"

"…" The weight of those words was too much for Shang Yi. She shot to her feet, abruptly changing the subject. "Anyway, the point is, even though opening the door was not good, it's not a big deal. The matter isn't serious. It's as simple as Ugly Boy forgetting to take out the trash when he leaves."

"Does Younger Sister Shang not desire her freedom?"

"Hurry up and eat. If there are leftovers tonight, we'll just have to make a random vegetable stew." Shang Yi hurriedly ladled food from the pot. The potatoes had already disintegrated and were impossible to scoop up.

She stood by the table scooping out vegetables, like a fisherman casting his net in a storm, flustered and clumsy.

"In the past, I was married off, first to a scholar, then to a squire. I never had control over my own fate, treated as no more than goods to be traded. That was a lack of freedom. Men chose me, judging my proper features, my virtuous temperament, my delicate feet. That was a lack of freedom. A man gave me the pills, and for that, I invited a fatal disaster. Though I did not die, it was not what I wanted, which was yet another lack of freedom."

When had Xu Wanqing embraced her? Were the cold tears on the back of her neck real?

Was it a hallucination? Or something else?

"Though Younger Sister Shang may have a thousand faults and ten thousand flaws, there are always one or two good things about you. It is for those one or two things that I dared to break free from my cage and become a free person. The customs of this modern world are enlightened, yet you hide and evade. Though I may be old-fashioned and dull, I dare not again pretend to be without feeling or devotion. It has always been others who chose me, picking me over like radishes and cabbages, scrutinizing and judging. You alone are the one I chose."

The ladle in Shang Yi's hand fell with a clatter.

"That pill is enough for you to live another hundred years, by which time nothing will be left. You speak of being chosen by this person or that, you speak of yourself as lowly, but even so, I chose you five hundred years ago. In five hundred years, I consumed five pills, fearing I would not be able to wait long enough. But when I finally saw you, I thought, you are the one I chose, but that is not freedom for you. How can you choose? Would you ever choose me? We transmigrated together into Miss Zhang Xu's body, struggling against one another. Separated by centuries, a thousand different chances made the absurd a reality, and I was actually able to wait for you. Compared to that immense impossibility, I care nothing for this Xu Min you speak of, or the man who bought you."

"Xu Wanqing," Shang Yi said, her head spinning.

"Today was merely a moment of urgency. I should not have said these things. But today, you seemed to be pushing me away, as if to say, 'Ah, this is just how bad I, Shang Yi, am. Don't you take my affairs to heart.' Though I do not understand modern… customs, I understand that in your heart, you are pushing me away, even though every word is meant as comfort, all your one-sided good intentions. Today, I will tell you plainly: I have lived to this day, becoming a monster who has lived for centuries, all for you. I hope for you to be a free person, and that one day, you might also choose me."

The hands wrapped around her waist tightened. Shang Yi placed her own hands over the ones that were trembling with nervousness.

"There are so many people in the modern world. Why would you choose me?"

Shang Yi couldn't process so many words. She could only slowly break free from Xu Wanqing's embrace and turn her back, not daring to look at her face. "I do like you."

"But it is not a choice. Is that right?"

It was rare for Xu Wanqing to say something so modern.

"Let's put it this way: it's fine for me to like you, but you'd better not like me back. This isn't an exchange. Don't act like a child playing house, where if I'm nice to you, you have to be nice to me…"

Shang Yi turned off the induction cooker and called someone to come collect the dishes. She slowly sat down on the sofa, grabbing a cushion and clutching it to her stomach, where it felt as if Xu Wanqing's fingers had left their mark. The lingering warmth and the budding, tender thoughts were gradually patted away by her.

"Are you still there?"

"Mm," came a muffled reply.

"When my aunt gave me to my mom for adoption, my mom was a bit thoughtless. She gave her two pounds of eggs. Don't you think comparing a baby girl to two pounds of eggs is a little much? My mom was good to me. She had money, sent me to the best schools, took me to museums and art galleries from a young age to cultivate my character. I learned piano, I learned dance. She was hoping to raise a refined socialite, but I ended up selling myself in college to start making money. My aunt, who gave birth to me, felt that since I was her firstborn, it was like all the good fortune from our ancestral tombs had been bestowed upon me. She started thinking two pounds of eggs was a raw deal, so she went to my mom to see if I could show her some filial piety too, since I had money." Shang Yi counted on her left hand, then her right, fiddling with her fingers.

"My mom found it absurd. When I was just a wrinkled baby, who could have known I'd one day come home with a suitcase full of cash? But when my aunt brought up the two pounds of eggs, my mom had nothing to say. Think about it—the breast milk, the long postpartum recovery, the costs were so high, and my foolish mom just gave her two pounds of eggs. A debt is a debt, and it had to be paid sooner or later. At that point, even a hundred pounds of eggs wouldn't have been enough. In the end, she gave them an apartment in Beijing, got the whole family Beijing residency permits, which took a lot of effort, and then threw in two Volkswagen cars. When the cars got scratched, they'd still call me. Later, they said Volkswagens looked too working-class and didn't fit the image of someone like me. They insisted on a Lamborghini. When they couldn't get one, they insisted on modifying a car. I told them a modified car couldn't be driven on the road, but they insisted. They spent the money and turned a car into something that looked like Optimus Prime. They really drove it on the road, got it impounded, and I had to be the one to get it out. My mom asked why I went to all that trouble. I said, wasn't it all because of those two pounds of eggs? It was all her fault for not seeing I was destined to make a fortune the day she adopted me and not shutting them up with more money then and there, buying me a lifetime of peace and quiet."

"Is one pill not enough? I have nothing else. Perhaps because I am from ancient times, I—"

"No, what I mean is, everything has a price. When I was little, if I wanted to go out and play, I had to practice piano for three hours to earn a permit to go outside. If I wanted to go to an amusement park, I had to bring home a report card showing I was first in my grade. You see? For two pounds of eggs, I've had to work myself to the bone. Your divine elixir is priceless. I couldn't repay you even if I sold everything I own."

"Why would I ask you to repay me? This is not…"

"This is an exchange." Shang Yi turned and stood up. Xu Wanqing stood there like an abandoned child, looking utterly forlorn.

Shang Yi's heart softened. "I don't know what I could possibly give you to repay your affection. A debt of human kindness is the hardest to repay. Even without that pill, I could never repay it. If I don't repay it, if I just accept it—'Oh, Xu Wanqing loves me, Xu Wanqing is so good to me, I'm so happy'… wouldn't that be the same as being bought? Just like with Xu Ancheng! He bought me with villas, companies, stock options, and a string of zeros in a bank account. I can't repay him, and that's why I'm not free… I don't love him, so it doesn't matter if I'm not free; it's just business. But we're not like that. I don't want it to be like that. You know I like you."

In her hysteria, she had even used his full name.

The person coming to collect the dishes knocked on the door. Shang Yi wiped her face and turned away. "That's all. I didn't mean to say so much. You just misunderstood. I just wanted to say, don't feel guilty. I'm not angry, no matter what you do."

Almost as if she were fleeing, she darted into the bathroom. The sound of rushing water started up, like a waterfall crashing violently against hard stone.

Previous Table of Contents Next