Emergence - Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The illness struck with a vengeance. For two weeks, Lin Yi was confined to her bed, forced to care for herself and silently swallow handfuls of medicine. She didn't dare tell her parents, much less her in-laws. Her husband was nowhere to be seen, and she couldn't bring herself to confide in her close friends. She could only suffer this in silence.

The treatment was an agonizing ordeal. Every day was a living hell. She would lie in bed, drenched in a cold sweat from the pain. The pain in her lower body radiated throughout her entire being, especially her head, which felt as if it would split her soul apart. Sometimes, as she lay there, she even experienced auditory hallucinations-a constant ringing in her ears, punctuated by inexplicable whispers. She felt like she was going insane.

After two weeks, she had lost a significant amount of weight, becoming almost skeletal. A beautiful, newly-married woman who, like most beauty-conscious women, had been worrying about a little extra weight and planning to diet and exercise, had instead been reduced to a bag of bones in this tragic way.

Her fair skin turned a sallow, sickly yellow. Her bright, almond-shaped eyes, once clear, now seemed veiled by a layer of gray, dull and vacant, as if she were in a stupor. The once sharp, intelligent, and capable career woman was now slow to react, lost in a daze.

Her friends called during her two-week leave, but she brushed them off with excuses, lying that she was traveling with her husband. Everyone assumed she was in the blissful honeymoon phase. Her parents also thought she was away, and her in-laws never bothered to check on her.

When her husband returned a month later, he was shocked to see Lin Yi so emaciated. But his lips trembled, and in the end, he couldn't even utter a single word of comfort.

Lin Yi's leave was over. Unless she wanted to lose her job, she couldn't stay home any longer. But in her current state, wouldn't she give everyone at the office a fright? Left with no choice, Lin Yi returned to work. She applied thick makeup to hide her sickly complexion and wore as many layers as possible to conceal her thin frame. Even so, upon her return, she was met with the suspicious and uncertain gazes of many colleagues. Though no one asked, it felt like a slap in the face, leaving her deeply unsettled. For someone as proud as Lin Yi, who had excelled since childhood, this blow was far too cruel.

Zhang Yucheng seemed to feel guilty. This time, he didn't leave immediately but stayed at home for a long while. Lin Yi didn't question him about his philandering. The affection she once had for him had long been ground to dust by weeks of pain; she had even begun to feel hatred toward him. But Lin Yi was an adult. She knew that marriage was not easy and required mutual tolerance and effort to maintain. She was a successful woman with an enviable family; divorce was not something she could consider lightly. No matter how bitter and painful it was on the inside, she had to maintain a radiant exterior. She hated the contemptuous or pitying looks of others; for her proud self, that was the most unbearable thing. A divorced woman was like a product on clearance, destined to be sold cheap. She was unwilling to sell herself cheap.

Her in-laws, who had been absent for a long time, suddenly reappeared, carrying large bags of supplements and food. Her mother-in-law would brew soup for Lin Yi every day, filled with handfuls of tonics that Lin Yi was forced to consume. She was forbidden from preparing her own three daily meals; everything was handled by her mother-in-law and a newly hired maid. It seemed her in-laws were desperate to put the weight Lin Yi had lost back on her instantly.

Two weeks later, Lin Yi's complexion had improved significantly. Her in-laws' apologetic and fawning attitude made it clear they hoped she would overlook her severe illness and continue to be their obedient daughter-in-law. Although still deeply uncomfortable, Lin Yi endured it.

A few days later, Lin Yi came home from work to find Zhang Yucheng sitting in the living room, smoking, seemingly troubled by something. Lin Yi didn't ask. She went about her routine: washing her hands, changing her clothes, and cooking dinner. After the two had eaten in silence, Zhang Yucheng sat on the sofa, waiting until Lin Yi came out of the shower before he finally stammered,

"I-I went to the hospital for a check-up during this time. It should… it should be fine now…"

With her wet hair hanging loose, Lin Yi stared at him, her face expressionless. His wife's gaze seemed to corner him. Steeling himself, he said,

"My mom wants us to have a child as soon as possible…"

Lin Yi was once again pinned beneath him. For the first time in her life, she felt a profound sense of humiliation and hatred. It was as if she were being used as a breeding tool, stripped of her human dignity, like a sow whose sole purpose in life was to produce the next generation.

But still, she couldn't resist. She couldn't scream, "Don't touch me," or shout, "I don't want to have a child." The very reason she had married was to have a happy family of three; she hadn't forgotten this wish. She desperately wanted a child, to experience the blissful process of pregnancy and childbirth that others spoke of. Only then would her life be without regret; only then would she be complete as a woman. This wasn't just her wish, but her parents' as well. The old couple had been waiting for half a year, eager for the birth of a grandchild. She didn't want to disappoint them.

Yet all of this seemed to have gone astray. She clutched the bedsheets, and tears of sorrow streamed down her face…

Six months into the marriage, Lin Yi could sense that her husband didn't love her. He probably had other women on the side, frequently philandering to the point of infecting her with an STD. She seemed to have grown accustomed to the sight of Zhang Yucheng fleeing in haste after he was finished with her, leaving her alone in the empty bed. She began to feel resentment. She had to find out who was responsible for her misery. She had to know who her enemy was.

She grew paranoid, began to investigate Zhang Yucheng, and even started tailing him herself. Her temper became volatile and erratic, she couldn't control her emotions, and terrifying thoughts often crossed her mind. She developed insomnia, her ears straining every night for the sound of his return. This led to a nervous breakdown. She frequently made basic mistakes at work, earning reprimands from her superiors and scornful looks from colleagues.

But in the end, she couldn't find anything unusual about Zhang Yucheng. There were no women around him, only groups of men. He was on very good terms with these men, drinking with them every night. When he didn't come home, he was almost always staying at his good buddy's place. Lin Yi's tracking skills were limited, and this was all the intelligence she could gather.

Soon, something else occupied her mind, leaving her no time to worry about Zhang Yucheng's affairs.

She was pregnant.

The ten months of pregnancy were nothing like the beautiful experience she had imagined. When her mother heard the news, she was so happy she came over to care for her every day. But Lin Yi's health was terrible. Getting pregnant at such a critical juncture was another blow to her physical and mental state. As for her in-laws, while they were happy to hear the news, there was always a strange expression on their faces.

For a full ten months, she felt as if she were wading through purgatory. Upon hearing she was pregnant, Zhang Yucheng seemed to distance himself even further, staying away from home for days on end. Severe morning sickness made her vomit until the world spun, and she could barely keep any food down, eventually throwing up bile. Later, she could even see traces of blood in it.

Her throat was terribly swollen and bloodshot, making it difficult to swallow solid food. She could only have bland, tasteless liquid meals every day. Every night was a struggle to fall asleep, which made her mental state even more lethargic. Other women gained weight during pregnancy, but she grew thinner, her round belly a stark contrast to her withered arms-a frightening sight to behold.

But those ten months of pregnancy were also when her fighting spirit was at its highest. She knew a turning point was coming. Once she gave birth, the child would be her support. She longed for this child, loved this child. As long as the baby could come into this world healthy and safe, any suffering she endured would be worth it.

On July 23, 2014, after five agonizing hours of labor, Lin Yi finally gave birth at the maternity hospital. The baby was a girl, wrinkled and red like a little monkey. Zhang Yucheng was there that day. Her mother-in-law, ecstatic, handed the baby to him, but he stood there like a block of wood, looking at the child as if it were an object. His gaze toward Lin Yi was just as lifeless, radiating a terrifying coldness. The day after the child was born, Zhang Yucheng left on another business trip.

The postpartum confinement period pushed Lin Yi's mental state to its limit. Every day she felt useless, lying in bed, exhausted by the baby's crying, while the pain of lactation was unbearable. At the same time, her father suffered a sudden stroke and was hospitalized. Her mother couldn't be in two places at once; she was worn out from rushing back and forth, and her own health was beginning to suffer. Feeling for her mother, Lin Yi lied, saying her mother-in-law came to care for her every day and that she shouldn't worry. So, her mother focused on caring for her father. As for the so-called mother-in-law, she only made perfunctory visits, bringing some token food before quickly leaving. She mostly brought things for the baby; supplements for Lin Yi were pitifully few. Eventually, this mother-in-law started showing up empty-handed, having apparently done her duty.

Lin Yi had to manage everything herself. During a time when she was supposed to be recovering, she had to get out of bed to change diapers and feed the baby, her nerves constantly on edge from lack of sleep at night. It was summer, and the baby was always restless in the air-conditioned room, sometimes hot, sometimes cold, crying incessantly. Lin Yi was nearly driven to a breakdown.

Lin Yi's postpartum recovery was poor, leaving her with a host of health problems, especially severe headaches that were excruciating when they flared up. During that time, she suffered from severe postpartum depression, but no one cared. Her close friends had started avoiding her, and her boss was so dissatisfied he was on the verge of firing her. Her closest relative, her father, was ill, and her mother was exhausted from caring for him. Her in-laws were indifferent to her, and her husband was a stranger. In the lonely days and nights, there was also a helpless infant, crying and needing her comfort. It felt as if she was the only one left in the world, stumbling forward in tatters. This was likely the root cause of her worsening mental illness.

But at least she had her child to keep her going. That is, until the baby's one-month celebration, when a bolt from the blue struck Lin Yi, shattering her ability to endure any longer.

Her husband was forced to show up for the baby's one-month banquet, where they hosted some relatives and friends. After the banquet, because both Lin Yi and Zhang Yucheng had drunk a fair amount, her in-laws, worried they couldn't take proper care of the baby, took the child back to their home. But Lin Yi and Zhang Yucheng went their separate ways as soon as they left the hotel.

Reeking of alcohol, Zhang Yucheng got into an unfamiliar black sedan driven by a man. Lin Yi, determined to seize this opportunity to find out who her husband's mistress was, hailed a taxi and followed them. The black car eventually stopped in a residential complex. Lin Yi got out and quietly approached the vehicle. Her husband and the man remained in the car for a long time. Lin Yi decided to get a closer look. To her shock, she saw her husband and the other man passionately kissing inside the car. The sight was so jarring it nearly suffocated her. It was like a lightning bolt striking her mind, leaving her stunned and unable to process what she was seeing for a long time.

The two men got out of the car, arms around each other, and went upstairs. Lin Yi stood frozen in the shadow of a large tree below, feeling for the first time like the most foolish woman in the world.

Her husband was gay!

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